lmbachman

Search for a member

Offline (the 05/01/2016 at 5:16am)

lmbachman

19Fucked!

lmbachman
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3891
  • Number of comments : 198
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About lmbachman : I see you peeking.

lmbachman's page activity

Visits<b>Rababco</b> - 16 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 10:51pm<b>anonymous198913</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:27pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 3:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:40am<b>LuxEtTenebris</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 11:54pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 5:53am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:01am<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 6:21pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:15pm<b>pupeve</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 11:04am<b>WoodKiller</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 1:22am<b>Tenker</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 12:37am<b>Trup75</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 11:25pm<b>Setareh23</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 3:31pm<b>orcatheseapanda</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 6:15am<b>Lepisma</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 2:08am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:35am

Fucked!<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 1:01pm<b>orcatheseapanda</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:15pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 8:12pm<b>bigirlsrockoxox</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 4:56am<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 11:08pm<b>WoodKiller</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 4:32pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:05am<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:15pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:27pm<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:49pm<b>dyoy_87</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:32pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 5:05am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 2:08am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:19pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 12:44am<b>dramaelf</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 8:41pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 6:55am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 4:44pm

lmbachman's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lmbachman's badges

lmbachman's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML

by j / 04/18/2016 at 6:24pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my sister shared a post on Facebook which talked about how gays are destroying the "sanctity of marriage". I couldn't help but point out that she's been married 3 times in the last 7 years, while I've been happily married to my wife for nearly 9. She deleted my comment then blocked me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2016 at 4:15am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

by leahrb / 02/24/2016 at 1:55pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML

by oh / 02/22/2016 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2016 at 7:53am / United Kingdom (Merton) / Love

Today, I found out that every time my boyfriend has cutely joked about my clothes not matching while we're just lounging around the house, he's really been hoping I would catch on that he thinks I look like a slob. FML

by Rachel / 02/12/2016 at 1:26am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, after weeks of debating with myself, I finally got the courage to ask out my best friend of 9 years. She turned me down, saying that dating me would be like adopting a puppy, and she doesn't want that kind of responsibility. FML

by adoptablepuppy / 01/28/2016 at 8:17pm / United States (New York) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML

by crinitis / 01/28/2016 at 11:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss used our communal notebook to bitch out our entire department for not leaving a note notifying her that one of the machines was down. She wrote it on the same page as the note I left saying that one of the machines was down. FML

by Helpful Smile / 01/25/2016 at 9:56pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, at 26, I got chicken pox. My parents stand by their belief that I got it because I'm not right with God, not because they didn't vaccinate me. FML

by kinzielee / 01/05/2016 at 12:41pm / United States (Florida) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after much reflection, I realized my "happy childhood" was more like "the years I was oblivious to how much people despised me." FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2016 at 9:07pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 15 year-old brother told us his girlfriend is pregnant. He was taught in his abstinence-only sex ed that condoms don't prevent pregnancy. My parents are blaming her pregnancy on me, for not telling him the truth about sex, because parents giving their kids the sex talk is "too awkward." FML

Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML

by killmenow / 12/03/2015 at 12:33am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend emotionally proposed over dinner, and I said yes. Soon after he left, he tweeted "I just fucked up...." and a few minutes later called me and claimed the proposal was a prank. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2015 at 1:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my coworker brought her 3-year-old son to work with her. When introducing him to me, she dropped her bag and bent over to pick it up, knocking him over with her butt in the process. When she stood up, she noticed he was sitting on the ground crying. She then accused me of pushing him over. FML

by Notakidpusher / 11/23/2015 at 10:34pm / United States (California) / Work