Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

llamafish

Offline (the 08/02/2015 at 11:30pm) | Search for a member

llamafish

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 November 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6389
  • Number of comments : 393
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About llamafish : ...

llamafish's page activity

Visits<b>HoboRain</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 10:37am<b>Krastrolytric</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 4:05pm<b>takenbyarmyboy</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 12:40pm<b>tanziir1</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:01pm<b>oreily12</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:19am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 6:19pm<b>SayakaxOue</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:26am<b>ethanc12</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 12:51am<b>zAstonish</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 10:22am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 5:52pm<b>LaughyTaffee</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:22pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:25am<b>stingfish101</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:46am<b>Nicky93</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 11:04pm<b>drghost</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 1:35pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 3:28pm<b>Thnks_Fr_Th_Bnds</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:08am<b>DestinysChampion</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 12:12pm

Fucked!<b>SayakaxOue</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:26am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 10:53pm<b>LaughyTaffee</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 8:22pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:25am<b>Thnks_Fr_Th_Bnds</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:56pm

llamafish's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of llamafish's badges

llamafish's favorite FMLs

Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML

#21170120
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42444) - you deserved it (18386)

On 06/10/2014 at 9:01pm - animals - by imalosertho (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

#21155508
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62833) - you deserved it (4863)

On 05/29/2014 at 2:46am - animals - by Idk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after a long day at work, I was starving, so I stopped by the drive-through for something to eat. When I got home and hurriedly opened the bag, all I found inside was napkins. Thanks, McDonald's. FML

#21136073
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44276) - you deserved it (10756)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:34pm - work - by can't eat paper - United States

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64131) - you deserved it (8118)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML

Today, at a big Easter egg hunt, the kids found a wild bunny. Everyone smiled and "aww"ed, until my dog caught and ate it in front everyone. FML

#21118358
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44898) - you deserved it (5220)

On 04/20/2014 at 7:24pm - animals - by BetterThanChocolate (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML

#21079127
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38960) - you deserved it (15654)

On 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, while walking through Wal-Mart I noticed a cute employee. With a sudden burst of confidence, I walked right up to him, intending to ask for his number. Instead, I looked him in the eye and said, "Excuse me sir, how much do you know about bedsheets?" and then ran. FML

#21077619
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41715) - you deserved it (11678)

On 03/04/2014 at 4:06am - love - by booksandshadows (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at the bank where I work, I escorted a very short woman to her safe deposit box in the vault. I left her alone, knowing she could use the phone to call the reception when she was ready to leave. We later realised the phone was too high for her to reach. If glares could kill. FML

#21057082
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43385) - you deserved it (6922) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/11/2014 at 5:01am - work - by norina (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I accidentally asked the cashier at Wendy's how much their 99 cent chicken nuggets were. I guess he is still laughing at me. FML

#21056193
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37826) - you deserved it (19804)

On 02/10/2014 at 10:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was told I looked like Beaker from the Muppets. After doing a side-by-side comparison, I realized it's true. FML

#21032010
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39134) - you deserved it (4336)

On 01/18/2014 at 6:09pm - misc - by cjgreer70 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

#21023350
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44261) - you deserved it (5443)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:15am - animals - by RaccoonFever - United States (California)

Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML

#21018030
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53793) - you deserved it (7180)

On 01/05/2014 at 4:45pm - health - by stillhurting (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

#21015899
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43611) - you deserved it (8181) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Elisa_LmR (woman) - France



FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #17
  • It's here! Yep, time once more to delve into the darkest corners of the FML postbag and check out the stuff that never would've seen the light of day, had we not had a vicious streak in our brains. It's…

Tuesday 25 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: