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lkalili

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lkalili

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 522
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About lkalili : I love Fml!! Whenever I'm having a bad day I go on here and I feel 10x better!! I love this website!!

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lkalili's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57494) - you deserved it (14839)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom came into my room to have a heart to heart talk. My dildo was sitting on the nightstand. I didn't notice until she told me to make sure the dog didn't get it. FML

#4156133
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11470) - you deserved it (47139)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:02am - intimacy - by BrokenVow (woman) - Canada (British Columbia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I thought I could stay on the phone and go to the bathroom without him noticing. My mom knocks on the door and without even thinking, I yelled "I'M ON THE TOILET!" He said "ew.." FML

#2086057
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9652) - you deserved it (67859)

On 05/19/2009 at 5:51pm - misc - by June (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I were having some fertilization problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said "mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

#814298
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69429) - you deserved it (4533)

On 04/05/2009 at 9:32am - health - by manlyman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

#800425
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (277931) - you deserved it (17727)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm - intimacy - by GuitarChick42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

#796416
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70901) - you deserved it (38870)

On 04/04/2009 at 4:04am - intimacy - by showerstupid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML

#80868
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33118) - you deserved it (4506)

On 02/19/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by Kev (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my lesbian sister enthusiastically showed me her new strap on. Not only does she get more girls than me, she now has a bigger penis too. FML

#60108
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62583) - you deserved it (4842)

On 02/17/2009 at 10:27am - misc - by stillsingleladies (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my nephew asked me how babies are made. I thought he'd had this chat with his mom, but I went in to it again. After a 20 minute 'discussion', he says "So what about the good stuff - get to the blowjobs and the lesbians." He's 11. FML

#3221
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23527) - you deserved it (2379)

On 01/28/2009 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by epistaxis - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML

#1389
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32738) - you deserved it (2328)

On 01/16/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Ohai - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was looking for a magazine in my mother's bedside cabinet and I came across some daft test about sex. Apparently, my mother likes anal, oral, and my dad's cock is bent. Nauseous. FML

#386
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37766) - you deserved it (8888)

On 11/25/2008 at 3:54am - intimacy - by mael - Sent from mobile version



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