About lionqueen1400 : I'm just an average, weird kid who likes to hear how fucked up some other people's lives are. And I love cats.
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Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35559) - you deserved it (9660)
On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31169) - you deserved it (5737)
On 08/19/2010 at 1:26am - love - by Single - United States (California)
Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48184) - you deserved it (2705)
On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)
Today, my friends were all sharing sweet things their boyfriends had shared with them. After hearing "he says I look pretty without makeup" or "he promises we'll get married one day", I realized that the only compliment he's given me is that my laughter "sounds like a squirrel having a seizure." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22740) - you deserved it (3774)
On 08/16/2010 at 1:03am - love - by 86145 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was showing my three year-old that going down the deck steps are perfectly safe. At the top, I tripped on my shoe and fell head first down every step. I now have five stitches and a three year old who won't go anywhere near the deck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17558) - you deserved it (5578)
On 08/12/2010 at 9:06pm - misc - by Diana (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28741) - you deserved it (5839)
On 08/11/2010 at 9:54pm - intimacy - by oumalina (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He is the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24517) - you deserved it (6337)
On 08/10/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by verno02 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was playing a math game with a 4th grade boy (I'm a college graduate). I cheated during the entire game, and still lost 7 of the 9 rounds we played. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6342) - you deserved it (29277)
On 08/06/2010 at 2:45am - kids - by riahta (man) - United States (California)
Today, my family and I watched Madagascar 2. When we got to the part where Gloria the hippopotamus is praised for her chunkyness, my little sister looked at me and said, "If you were a hippo, maybe then you would get a date." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25903) - you deserved it (5345)
On 08/03/2010 at 6:37pm - misc - by fatty - United States (New York)
Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6738) - you deserved it (24370)
On 08/02/2010 at 5:50am - work - by Julia (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)
Today, I was repainting the walls in my room. While painting, I noticed a dark spot on the wall that wouldn't seem to go away no matter how much paint I put on it. A bucket of paint and hours later, I realized that "dark spot" was a shadow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6164) - you deserved it (40865)
On 07/30/2010 at 9:44pm - misc - by ick - United States (California)
Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13059) - you deserved it (18031)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't figure out how to open the bottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7907) - you deserved it (23673)
On 07/24/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by tstaeger (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29473) - you deserved it (13428)
On 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20673) - you deserved it (37519)
On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)
Monday 20 May 2013
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