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lindon555

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lindon555

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 647
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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lindon555's page activity

Visits<b>azelk</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 10:44pm<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:09am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:45am<b>lil_ham1644</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 6:51pm<b>Candycake</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 7:48pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/17/2012 at 12:20am<b>UrCapsLockOn</b> - the 12/04/2011 at 2:22pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 12/04/2011 at 2:08pm

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lindon555's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

#19059244
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9698) - you deserved it (73863)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

#18990200
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15405) - you deserved it (31420)

On 02/04/2012 at 5:16am - intimacy - by mattttbob - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents are on holiday, which means I have the house to myself. Wild parties? Hot girls? Loads of beer? No. Flu. FML

#18843444
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28632) - you deserved it (5985)

On 01/18/2012 at 10:29am - health - by partypooper (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out the girl I've been fooling around with for two weeks has a boyfriend, who is in jail, and is a member of the Aryan Brotherhood. FML

#18833133
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35006) - you deserved it (6733)

On 01/17/2012 at 6:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML

#18815137
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27140) - you deserved it (4566)

On 01/15/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by Ange (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed fuck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML

#18815086
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26425) - you deserved it (4305)

On 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by soontobedumped (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML

#18814672
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34747) - you deserved it (12228)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

#18390822
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34946) - you deserved it (5302)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49508) - you deserved it (3865)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29466) - you deserved it (8241)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31391) - you deserved it (2997)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44029) - you deserved it (2964)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

#16154731
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29522) - you deserved it (6096)

On 05/13/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by Username -

Today, as I was filling out divorce paperwork, I realized that my son has had the same girlfriend through both of my marriages. He's 17. FML

#16141236
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18636) - you deserved it (50859)

On 05/12/2011 at 7:09am - love - by Username -

Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML

#16030983
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37827) - you deserved it (4113)

On 05/03/2011 at 10:23am - misc - by Diesel (man) - Belgium (Luxembourg)



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