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lilpimpsmama

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lilpimpsmama

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 August 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 325
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lilpimpsmama's page activity

Visits<b>becca1185</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 10:50am<b>kingsian</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 10:11am<b>yresim</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 3:26pm

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lilpimpsmama's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35001) - you deserved it (5938)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I learned my dog had eaten a roll of vet wrap, which is like a long strip of bandage. I learned this when she tried to pass it in the yard today, and could only do so with my help. It seemed to never end. FML

#20477009
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26529) - you deserved it (2606)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML

#20475642
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42572) - you deserved it (4842)

On 01/23/2013 at 9:59pm - love - by ohokay (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

#20472773
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29944) - you deserved it (2610)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:14am - work - by Job Seeking (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

#20470936
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46462) - you deserved it (3969)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44345) - you deserved it (9220)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

#20450521
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38238) - you deserved it (5781)

On 01/09/2013 at 6:55pm - love - by GDBeast (man) - United States

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50318) - you deserved it (4838)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, in the "end-of-the-world" spirit, I asked my boyfriend to marry me. His response was, "It's really windy out." FML

#20410172
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18081) - you deserved it (25481)

On 12/20/2012 at 11:05pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was separating my notes into two piles: one to save for exam studying and one to throw out. I finished separating, picked up the junk pile and absentmindedly shredded it. Afterwards, I looked down to see the junk pile still completely intact. Goodbye, passing grades. FML

#20180442
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10065) - you deserved it (26798)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:03pm - work - by shark - United States (Texas)

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

#20177257
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25114) - you deserved it (1758)

On 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40044) - you deserved it (1826)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

#20140004
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27385) - you deserved it (2858)

On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

#20135378
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49509) - you deserved it (2606)

On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States



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