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lemonkittens

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lemonkittens
  • Town/Country : Narnia(:
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 May 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 669
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About lemonkittens : like:
ADTR, Rise Against, Florence+the Machine, my boyfriend, drumline, gingers, baton twirling, ps3, people who can make me laugh, candy, partying, being sarcastic, cats :)

dislike:
stupid questions, stirrup pants, little yappy dogs, hoes, the sun, Glee, ugly children, people who cannot spell and chew with their mouths open.

*you and me, we stand for somethin'.* A Day To Remember

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50 favourites

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

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lemonkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

#20478132
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23477) - you deserved it (3235)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm - love - by vagina dentata for christmas, pls (woman) - United States

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39879) - you deserved it (5295) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27950) - you deserved it (2841)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML

#20407286
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27582) - you deserved it (3157)

On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my brother paid the DJ $300 to ruin my wedding by playing the Imperial Death March as I walked down the aisle. FML

#20400363
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30538) - you deserved it (4017)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

#20035075
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22997) - you deserved it (1099)

On 08/22/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up naked, duck taped to the wall with no memory of last night. FML

#19935617
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7720) - you deserved it (21673)

On 07/14/2012 at 1:49am - misc - by tapeissticky591 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

#19642292
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22240) - you deserved it (2090)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

#19066178
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16272) - you deserved it (3606)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm - kids - by Username - India

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

#18784375
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10651) - you deserved it (16420)

On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25276) - you deserved it (11768)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27757) - you deserved it (406)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (437)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (437)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37624) - you deserved it (3801)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States



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