Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lazch

Search for a member

lazch

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2780
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

lazch's page activity

Visits<b>BitsOBacon</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 9:40pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 5:52pm<b>hurley12</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 1:57am<b>Coop817</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 8:04pm<b>Sir_ND_Pity</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 1:47am

lazch's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of lazch's badges

lazch's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bd, I dreamd that she broke up with me, again. FML

#20670246
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43627) - you deserved it (5701)

On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -

Today , Ma Broter Tried To Convince Me To Get A Clitori Piercing At Is Recently Opened Piercing Studio . FML

#20668963
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59951) - you deserved it (6052)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today , I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. big fat FML

#20665284
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63540) - you deserved it (4143)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today.. . my broter's friend was about to drive ome drunk.. . so I convincd im to tink and not be stupid . It wasn't an invitation to puke on my floor ten try to crawl into bd wit me . FML

#20655778
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41841) - you deserved it (5339)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:52am - misc - by GaveAnInchTakeAMile (woman) - United States

Today, ma stalker ex girlfriend turnd up at ma wedding, uninvitd, wereing a wedding dress. FML

#20655660
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88995) - you deserved it (5635)

On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today... it's my birtday. Tree people wisd me appy birtday: Google... my insurance company... and te place I lease my car from. FML

#20649920
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53765) - you deserved it (4013)

On 05/08/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by trice (woman) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, MY FAMILY FLEW OUT TO SURPRISE MY GRANDMA FOR HER 70TH BIRTHDAY!! WHEN WE ARRIVD, SHE AN MY GRANDPA WERE BOTH SITTING ON THE COUCH, HIGH, SMOKING A JOINT!! FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50284) - you deserved it (11350)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today , nose started runninghile in bed with boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck , his shrt , an his silk sheets. FML

#20647224
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62261) - you deserved it (12012)

On 05/07/2013 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Sirah90 (woman) - United States

TODAY, I TRIED LYING TO MY PARENTS FIR THE FRST TIME . MY MOTHER IS A NEUROSCIENTIST AN MY FATHER IS A PSYCHOLOGIST . SOMEHOW, THEY MANAGED TO MAKE ME ADMIT THAT I WAS LYING BEFORE I'D EVEN FINISHED . FML

#20646351
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30931) - you deserved it (39901)

On 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm - misc - by blondie107 - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90199) - you deserved it (5650)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today , I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her fir half-an-hour I finally said , ( At least you're not doing drugs. ) She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said , ( At least I'm not a prostitute? ) FML

#20640404
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64076) - you deserved it (14082)

On 05/04/2013 at 3:22am - kids - by prostitott -

Yesterday, mah wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60607) - you deserved it (9157)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

I lerend my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I looool don't know if I'm more annoyd that he casually mentiond it after we've been together 4 10 yeres , or that it actually works. FML

#20636797
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45409) - you deserved it (13437)

On 05/02/2013 at 11:59am - intimacy - by MommaAnnie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today , mah crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face , accusing me of leering through looool her restroom windowhile she showered. I'm gay.

#20636451
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45108) - you deserved it (6220)

On 05/02/2013 at 4:27am - misc - by inyobeddd (man) - United States (California)

Today, mah mom asked me what a MILF is . Apparently that's her nickname at work . FML

#20634708
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53342) - you deserved it (4138)

On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: