About lastsinglepanda : " I'm not young enough to know everything so if stupidity got us into this, then why can't it get us out again? "
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23053) - you deserved it (8563)
On 09/12/2011 at 9:52am - animals - by squeak (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (1953)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States
Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27632) - you deserved it (18667)
On 09/10/2011 at 11:46am - intimacy - by RetroDayDreamer - United States (Texas)
Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12728) - you deserved it (27023)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was driving my drunk mother home when my phone rang. It was my boyfriend, so I asked her to answer the call. My mother then questioned him on our sex life and was especially interested to know if we'd used handcuffs because I "like them." I have no recollection of ever telling her this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21023) - you deserved it (3080)
On 09/09/2011 at 6:58am - intimacy - by psychicmother (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I was walking down the street when a police officer started walking behind me with his dog. I sped up and tried to cross the road. He took this as suspicious and got the dog to take me to the floor. I've been afraid of dogs since I was 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27205) - you deserved it (2989)
On 09/09/2011 at 5:59am - animals - by D (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I missed my bus, so I walked home in the rain from school, only to realize my mom had been following me the whole time in the car, laughing her ass off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30425) - you deserved it (2991)
On 09/07/2011 at 7:53pm - misc - by me - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I put my cat in the tub for a bath, as he rolled around in some mud. The second I put my hand on the faucet to turn the water on, he screamed, rather loudly. I yelled in shock, which must have scared him further, as he vigorously attacked my face and pissed on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16242) - you deserved it (10042)
On 09/07/2011 at 12:47pm - animals - by GEFStryker - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20471) - you deserved it (1748)
On 09/06/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by b3ardown23 - United States
Today, I picked up a lady's dropped wallet and chased after her despite my sprained ankle. When I finally caught up with her, she smashed her chili sauce filled hotdog across my face and kicked me in the groin, accusing me of stealing her wallet. I was kept at the police station for 3 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27883) - you deserved it (1674)
On 09/06/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by fmlsrslyahhh - Singapore
Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9944) - you deserved it (15932)
On 09/05/2011 at 10:52pm - health - by wheezy (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19779) - you deserved it (3551)
On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41340) - you deserved it (5083)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22018) - you deserved it (2629)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33265) - you deserved it (5029)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by May - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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