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lastsinglepanda

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lastsinglepanda
  • Town/Country : Pretoria, South Africa
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 June 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 2994
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About lastsinglepanda : " I'm not young enough to know everything so if stupidity got us into this, then why can't it get us out again? "

lastsinglepanda's last visitors

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lastsinglepanda's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of lastsinglepanda's badges

lastsinglepanda's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

#17313020
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38100) - you deserved it (7303)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by cutiekenz21 - United States (Oregon)

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

#17301663
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29716) - you deserved it (3314)

On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

#17298828
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24774) - you deserved it (4412)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (South Carolina)

Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML

#17283766
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7983) - you deserved it (47459)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:15am - work - by Champion the wonder horse - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28110) - you deserved it (14936)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35450) - you deserved it (5399)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24365) - you deserved it (3977)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I called my seven-year old son to help me with the ice-maker on the fridge because it wasn't working. Without even pausing, he turned the child lock off and started laughing at me. FML

#17260733
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12178) - you deserved it (33133)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:19pm - kids - by unnamed - United States (California)

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML

#17255469
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24890) - you deserved it (5638)

On 07/25/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by ninja_blasphemer (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, my husband, who is in the Navy, had a couple of his sailor friends over to hang out. The stereotype about their swearing is true. My two year old now won't stop saying "Fuck." FML

#17224016
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26686) - you deserved it (4345)

On 07/23/2011 at 12:05am - kids - by oliveoyl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35897) - you deserved it (7775)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I found out my grandmother has severe road rage after she complained about Pennsylvania drivers for over an hour, then decided to rear end one because he wouldn't get out of her way. FML

#17201189
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24490) - you deserved it (2216)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:54am - misc - by Courtney - United States

Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML

#17193667
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25863) - you deserved it (2062)

On 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm - misc - by cheddar (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30722) - you deserved it (6744)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

#17177469
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26381) - you deserved it (8276)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:45pm - animals - by craphanded - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)



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