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lastsinglepanda

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lastsinglepanda
  • Town/Country : Pretoria, South Africa
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 June 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 2995
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About lastsinglepanda : " I'm not young enough to know everything so if stupidity got us into this, then why can't it get us out again? "

lastsinglepanda's last visitors

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lastsinglepanda's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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lastsinglepanda's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML

#17474941
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8464) - you deserved it (32655)

On 08/14/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by MC (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30026) - you deserved it (8710)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML

#17465074
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7272) - you deserved it (48964)

On 08/13/2011 at 11:56pm - health - by j - United States

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

#17460856
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24630) - you deserved it (5219)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

#17457165
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14785) - you deserved it (23420)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:51am - kids - by brittbrat4 - United States (Florida)

Today, was the first day of my sophomore year. While receiving my schedule, I burst into tears at the sight of a disfigured midget. I'm now seen as the school bitch for making fun of a midget. I have a genuine fear of midgets. FML

Today, I was asked how far I've gone with a guy. My answer? Eye contact. I'm 19. FML

#17420241
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33737) - you deserved it (7209)

On 08/09/2011 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my wife didn't say a word to me because her horoscope told her not to. FML

#17418285
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32015) - you deserved it (3841)

On 08/09/2011 at 1:29pm - love - by MrOh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let go of my hand. Not wanting to lose her, I quickly tried to grab it back. That resulted in me grabbing some 50 year old man's junk. FML

#17408229
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33192) - you deserved it (5683)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by Sharee K. - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

#17391065
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30616) - you deserved it (9233)

On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

#17390536
445 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39362) - you deserved it (5803)

On 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm - love - by FML! - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#17390197
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29173) - you deserved it (2543)

On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41891) - you deserved it (2790)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

#17359587
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37105) - you deserved it (3596)

On 08/03/2011 at 9:19pm - animals - by roze198765 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

#17315366
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23757) - you deserved it (15278)

On 07/31/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by James (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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