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laden_swallow09

Offline (the 08/18/2014 at 4:10pm) | Search for a member

laden_swallow09

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5448
  • Number of comments : 1967
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - 13 hours ago<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:51am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:22pm<b>WantaDanish</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 10:36am<b>tylerbrynds</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 3:34am<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 2:36am<b>Blake77</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:08pm<b>akirakuran42</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:31pm<b>bkirky</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 7:12pm<b>mathen</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:23pm<b>JustinKs</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:54pm<b>josiemijn</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:32pm<b>FedoraGuy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 4:38pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:17pm<b>Onyxdragon</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:32pm<b>JVVortex</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:41am<b>moonbootz</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:59am<b>hare</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:18am

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laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42549) - you deserved it (2504)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, after finals, my English professor left me less than one percent from an A. Why? All semester long, he took away points because my opinions did not match his. FML

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

#20996030
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53805) - you deserved it (7097)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML

#20995972
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42707) - you deserved it (6190)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm - money - by pissed (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me via Facebook. I cared more about the spelling mistakes he made than the actual message. FML

#20994896
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36540) - you deserved it (10538)

On 12/16/2013 at 5:43pm - love - by dana (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

#20992659
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38380) - you deserved it (3676)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48871) - you deserved it (4479)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

#20991671
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39699) - you deserved it (3133)

On 12/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by thank u usa (man) - Germany

Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML

#20990341
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48980) - you deserved it (3132)

On 12/12/2013 at 4:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, a classmate's mother called my phone, threatening to have my dorm room raided for drugs. Why? She saw our text messages discussing where he would pick up the textbook I borrowed and thought it was the new "code name" for weed. FML

#20988723
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38227) - you deserved it (2441)

On 12/11/2013 at 6:58am - misc - by a.white - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, marks my fifth day being an English teacher's assistant. I spent it like the other four days: grading and editing terrible Teen Wolf, One Direction and Doctor Who high school fan-fiction. Six months until I get out of here. FML

#20987358
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37888) - you deserved it (5712)

On 12/10/2013 at 2:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52958) - you deserved it (2925)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

#20983816
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47175) - you deserved it (5501)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by john doe (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38629) - you deserved it (21448)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wicked mother has been with us for a week. She's already thrown away my daughter's favorite toy, broke my computer, scratched my oak table, stained my most expensive shirt, peed in our bed, and called the attention of the cops by staring at kids in school. She's staying for three months. FML



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