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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

21Fucked!

laden_swallow09laden_swallow09
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10183
  • Number of comments : 2589
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back some of my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

I like to point out stupidity whenever I see it, but that's likely why you're here, innit?

Oh, yeah. I almost forgot…
HEIL, SPELLCHECK!

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>Gillett</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Teckzilla</b> - 4 hours ago<b>apineapple</b> - 15 hours ago<b>coleh1998</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 12:36am<b>grajax</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:57pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Ghilliebro</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:38pm<b>Khepre</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:53am<b>jacky75</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:48am<b>aVindictiveWolf</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 4:37am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 4:05am<b>Dick_diamond</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:57am<b>grogers311</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 8:43pm<b>VeryMuchDutch</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:03am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:35am<b>Kazze</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 6:53pm<b>chidofrito</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:29am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 12:30am

Fucked!<b>Teckzilla</b> - just now<b>apineapple</b> - 9 hours ago<b>Ghilliebro</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:38am<b>Kazze</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:53am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:18am<b>TheTrainKid</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 9:44pm<b>Ingalls9</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:04pm<b>csjc</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 5:47am<b>demonddm</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:03pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:20am<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:01pm<b>coraline123c</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 3:49am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:07pm<b>AKlife9999</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:35pm<b>swagmaster696969</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:24pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:17pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:38pm

laden_swallow09's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of laden_swallow09's badges

laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML

#21281594
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30334) - you deserved it (5498)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:31am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that when I asked my buddy to make sure my girlfriend was safe while I was abroad, he really did; he even used a condom. FML

#21268339
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43767) - you deserved it (3996)

On 09/30/2014 at 1:45pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I waited for over an hour in a park for a date who didn't show up. I finally left because someone came up to me and accused me of creeping on their kids. FML

#21267321
65 comments

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48194) - you deserved it (3551)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I have learned a lot of "big" words from reading so much, but can actually only pronounce about half of them correctly. FML

#21264917
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (6264)

On 09/25/2014 at 1:48am - misc - by anon (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mom threw away a bag of tiny parts belonging to a $1,700 robot. Naturally, I figured this out at midnight and had to spend 30 minutes digging through three nasty trashcans overflowing with rotten food and spiders. The bag was dripping with what looked like cheese by the time I found it. FML

Today, we spent an entire day without being able to do work because our internet connection was down. Turns out, only the router had crashed and nobody bothered to reset it "to avoid doing further damage". FML

#21263926
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27351) - you deserved it (2861)

On 09/23/2014 at 4:19pm - work - by disconnected (woman) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)

Today, I had a garage sale, and had amongst my clothing a few sets of underwear. A old man came up and asked to buy all of them. I'm so poor, I couldn't say no to the pervert. FML

#21262480
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36432) - you deserved it (7697)

On 09/21/2014 at 2:23pm - money - by sickened (woman) - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

#21260464
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51481) - you deserved it (4992)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML

#21258738
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39315) - you deserved it (2284)

On 09/15/2014 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML

#21258420
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35655) - you deserved it (2813)

On 09/14/2014 at 11:07pm - work - by nocat6 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35412) - you deserved it (2935)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I confiscated a 1st grader's cell phone. It was better than anything I could come close to affording. FML

#21256659
154 comments

Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML

#21249416
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48818) - you deserved it (3918)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:34am - misc - by MLeguillon - United States (Missouri)



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