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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6085
  • Number of comments : 2021
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>simplysarcastics</b> - 16 hours ago<b>mip_92</b> - 24 hours ago<b>C_Sizzle247</b> - yesterday at 12:24pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - yesterday at 12:18pm<b>Ilovepancakes333</b> - yesterday at 10:06am<b>coltonte3</b> - yesterday at 8:38am<b>pptm</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 2:03pm<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 12:16pm<b>DavidX</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 1:49pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:50am<b>AdolphHipster</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:09pm<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 4:01pm<b>BlackIce911</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 2:13pm<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:12am<b>ChristianH39</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 3:04am<b>MrKronos</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:47am<b>drivingmissdaisy</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:32pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 7:36pm

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laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain what "cashback" was to a customer. She called me a liar and wanted to talk to a manager because she felt I made up the concept. I'm the manager. She wouldn't believe me and waited in the store for an hour. Apparently this is what a Masters degree gets me. FML

#21194527
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46828) - you deserved it (4132)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - work - by where do they come from - United States (Washington)

Today, while being high for the first time after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I called my dental assistant pretty before leaving, and then shouted, "I NEED TO POOP!" to the whole office. FML

#21191137
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38827) - you deserved it (7067)

On 06/28/2014 at 2:28am - health - by Madridsta - United States (California)

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42916) - you deserved it (6125)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52041) - you deserved it (16835)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I got the same feeling in my chest when I orgasmed as when I hit a hard section in Guitar Hero. FML

#21187067
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36450) - you deserved it (7413)

On 06/24/2014 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by massachusettsan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while working in a call center at a university, someone threatened to report me to the President of the University because "I" wouldn't accept their daughter who had a 1.5 GPA and "got accepted into Harvard". I don't even make the decisions, I just answer calls. FML

Today, I confronted my girlfriend over how she and a male friend have been going out together, drinking and partying, and at one point holding hands in the street. She angrily accused ME of cheating, because "confronting people like that" is apparently something only cheaters themselves do. FML

#21173408
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45266) - you deserved it (4505)

On 06/13/2014 at 3:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was walking in the street, and the next thing I know, I'm waking up in a hospital. According to witnesses, a guy came up and hit me over the head with a baseball bat. Apparently that's a thing that happens now. But it's okay, he had an excuse: he said he was drunk. FML

#21168803
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46941) - you deserved it (3469)

On 06/09/2014 at 9:56pm - health - by Harry (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at college, I was frantically trying to finish an essay on gay rights that was due less than an hour later. In the end I failed, because the college internet filters kept classifying every single page containing the information I needed as "sex", and blocked it all. FML

#21166210
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37455) - you deserved it (13301)

On 06/07/2014 at 3:16pm - work - by fstfckd (man) - United States

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42629) - you deserved it (6212)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML

#21164043
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52801) - you deserved it (3838)

On 06/05/2014 at 4:05pm - kids - by bastards (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, a customer at work said his table was dirty. I asked which one he was sitting at so I could clean it for him. For some bizarre reason he got pissed and called my manager over. He ended up reporting us to corporate, and my manager got written up. He's blaming me for everything. FML

#21163809
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40987) - you deserved it (3230)

On 06/05/2014 at 11:16am - work - by DarkSerebii (woman) - United States

Today, I figured I needed to go on a diet when I discovered I could make farting noises with my neck. FML

#21163432
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35351) - you deserved it (16421)

On 06/05/2014 at 12:11am - health - by fat and alone - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

#21161539
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30751) - you deserved it (9107)

On 06/03/2014 at 11:36am - kids - by properpissed (man) - United States (California)

Today, my university considered it an "embarrassment" that I was going to be the first and only person to graduate from my engineering course, so they gave free passes to two guys who hadn't finished their thesis yet. They were congratulated in the newspaper; I wasn't. FML



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