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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6625
  • Number of comments : 2123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>ang_ander10</b> - 13 hours ago<b>doginSC</b> - yesterday at 2:33pm<b>MrSassypants</b> - yesterday at 12:30pm<b>TheDvsOne</b> - yesterday at 8:09am<b>ispeakspanish</b> - yesterday at 7:14am<b>DenverTyrrell</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 2:03am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 9:33pm<b>MikeFletch</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 8:04pm<b>Mmmsushi</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 4:40pm<b>Fluckgworl</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 2:31pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 2:05pm<b>sdmarshall</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 8:26am<b>kionna_d</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:29am<b>denardo</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:52pm<b>3051628</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:20pm<b>marcus3695</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:17pm<b>JasperWrecks</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 3:10pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:38pm

Liked!<b>AKlife9999</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:35pm<b>swagmaster696969</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:24pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:17pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 8:50pm<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 6:01pm

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laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68087) - you deserved it (4153)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after buying 3 new alarm clocks, I finally decided to video tape myself all night to figure out if my alarm clock was broken or if I was oversleeping. Turns out I wake up around 4am each day and turn them off without remembering. FML

#20700571
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50392) - you deserved it (5998)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by sleepy momma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my parents were artists when they met. My mom said that I was one of their best projects yet. My sister, hearing what my mother said, broke my week-old PS3 in a rage. FML

#20699851
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47380) - you deserved it (3392)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:31pm - misc - by H1dd3n (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML

#20699444
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43892) - you deserved it (3364)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by WHOO HOO AIDS (woman) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

#20698730
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60419) - you deserved it (2970)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by regstl - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65652) - you deserved it (18718)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML

#20698103
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47734) - you deserved it (5514)

On 05/31/2013 at 8:50pm - money - by speechless (man) - United Kingdom (Wirral)

Today, I signed a two-year lease on a house. My next-door neighbor said she's in love with me, threatened my girlfriend, and won't stop blasting Taylor Swift. FML

#20696622
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49136) - you deserved it (3575)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:28am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be funny to go to the Apple store and log me on to Facebook on every single computer. FML

#20695876
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44469) - you deserved it (8453)

On 05/30/2013 at 7:06pm - love - by Terminator101101 - United States (Nevada)

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

#20695090
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47225) - you deserved it (3917)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

#20689621
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45927) - you deserved it (4032)

On 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm - work - by fuck you retail (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML

#20688020
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58826) - you deserved it (3984)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a group of guys came into my restaurant, dressed up in some kind of role-playing game clothing. Apparently I pronounced one of their fake elf names wrong, because the guy complained to my manager, who then bitched me out in front of everyone for upsetting the customers. FML

#20685944
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43728) - you deserved it (4387)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:13pm - work - by leela (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

#20684326
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40862) - you deserved it (6320)

On 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm - love - by yesguysgetabusedtoo (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

#20684326
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40862) - you deserved it (6320)

On 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm - love - by yesguysgetabusedtoo (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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