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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

16Liked!

laden_swallow09laden_swallow09
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9897
  • Number of comments : 2532
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back some of my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

I like to point out stupidity whenever I see it. That's likely why you're here, innit?

Oh, yeah. I almost forgot…
HEIL, SPELLCHECK!

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>Ricky27753</b> - 16 hours ago<b>j_cat187</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Rolz14</b> - 20 hours ago<b>Bend0n</b> - 23 hours ago<b>EternalOptimist</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 11:38am<b>okibi1</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 11:05am<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:18am<b>3051628</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 1:16am<b>MMSINCsidecars</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:36am<b>mellingitisbloom</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:11am<b>Setareh23</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:57pm<b>cabub007</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 10:03am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 12:36pm<b>annihil8or</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:26am<b>skobisco</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 8:56pm<b>TheTrainKid</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:44pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 12:20am<b>fridaayy</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 4:44pm

Liked!<b>TheTrainKid</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 9:44pm<b>Ingalls9</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:04pm<b>csjc</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 5:47am<b>demonddm</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:03pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:20am<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:01pm<b>coraline123c</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 3:49am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:07pm<b>AKlife9999</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:35pm<b>swagmaster696969</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:24pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:17pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 8:50pm<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 6:01pm

laden_swallow09's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of laden_swallow09's badges

laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two years ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. FML

#21366066
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45808) - you deserved it (2107)

On 03/01/2015 at 6:36pm - work - by kysier (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after a 7 year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

#21365913
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (6413)

On 03/01/2015 at 2:24pm - intimacy - by love and tolerape, apparently (man) - India (Jharkhand)

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18179) - you deserved it (33)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my fiance and his family accused me of being with him only because he's rich, refusing to go ahead with the wedding. I accepted his marriage proposal 4 years ago, when he was penniless and unemployed. FML

#21362501
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9) - you deserved it (2182)

On 02/24/2015 at 10:10am - love - by Anonymous - India (Tamil Nadu)

Today, a woman yelled at me for holding a door open for her. FML

#21361801
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31161) - you deserved it (2816)

On 02/23/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Wutdafuqq (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44329) - you deserved it (4016)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30403) - you deserved it (9061)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

#21357102
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40714) - you deserved it (2143)

On 02/16/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I figured out how my birth control works. If you're on your period for four months straight you can't have sex, so you won't be pregnant. FML

#21351947
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33642) - you deserved it (3412)

On 02/08/2015 at 5:26am - health - by irwingiggles (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

#21346273
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27900) - you deserved it (2156)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm - health - by ThatWasntFun - United States (Florida)

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

#21343453
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37386) - you deserved it (2570)

On 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Giurgiu)

Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML

#21342800
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41765) - you deserved it (2517)

On 01/23/2015 at 9:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

#21339526
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26868) - you deserved it (18720)

On 01/18/2015 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I found out how whipped I am when, at the climax of sex, I moaned, "I'm sorry!" FML

#21337152
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26681) - you deserved it (6143)

On 01/14/2015 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by imsorry (man) - United States (California)

Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML

#21333944
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39929) - you deserved it (2463)

On 01/09/2015 at 2:04pm - love - by je suis christy - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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