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kylielaura

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kylielaura
  • Town/Country : rainbow flat, australia
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 February 1981 (33 years)
  • Number of visits : 431
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About kylielaura : Im a fun loving lady with a very sick mind!

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kylielaura's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML

#16432657
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34003) - you deserved it (4576)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:44am - health - by mrsekko - United States

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

#16017618
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38853) - you deserved it (3838)

On 05/02/2011 at 9:51am - health - by megomania (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband told me that he can't find his passport. We're supposed to be leaving for Prague in two days. He's known about the trip for months. It was the anniversary vacation that was going to help our frayed relationship. Now my money is going to a hotel in Prague, but I'm not. FML

#15691728
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22257) - you deserved it (3440)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:07am - misc - by stuckhome (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

#15408372
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29463) - you deserved it (5911)

On 03/20/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at my wedding, my brother decided it would be funny to trip me as I was walking down the aisle, in front of hundreds of people. FML

#15395122
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47743) - you deserved it (3288)

On 03/20/2011 at 3:44am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

#15345509
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30021) - you deserved it (4577)

On 03/17/2011 at 12:04am - kids - by Username -

Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML

#14665942
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28345) - you deserved it (8067)

On 01/21/2011 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by alaskan1989 - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to a man stroking my leg while smelling my hair. I asked my roommate who he was and she said, "Oh, that's just my brother. He needs a place to stay and he will be living with us until June. Didn't I tell you that?" No, you didn't. FML

#13948319
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29203) - you deserved it (2263)

On 11/23/2010 at 10:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned to never shave your downstairs when you have the hiccups. FML

#12797931
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16121) - you deserved it (24149)

On 08/29/2010 at 1:02am - health - by yggiz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring at my ass, so I smiled at him. My mother noticed he was checking my ass out, and she approached him and said "I know she has a big ass, but it's rude to stare, son." FML

#12405087
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33633) - you deserved it (3740)

On 08/09/2010 at 3:07am - intimacy - by hard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after getting my appendix taken out, we had to drive over five sets of railroad tracks. Then, my four year old brother decided to punch me in the stomach because, "I took away his mommy for two days." FML

#11459471
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39388) - you deserved it (2779)

On 06/25/2010 at 8:30pm - love - by cduttl1230 - United States (Idaho)

Today, I walked into work to see my boss's hot son. I wanted him to notice me, so I did my "sexy walk". I then slipped and fell onto my desk, broke my desk, and sprained my wrist. Oh he noticed me alright. FML

#11105211
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11064) - you deserved it (34254)

On 06/10/2010 at 3:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, Ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML

#7757731
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18833) - you deserved it (2407)

On 01/31/2010 at 9:12pm - misc - by youlyingjerk (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML

#7353628
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24670) - you deserved it (2803)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:33am - love - by Romantic (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

#6712384
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12080) - you deserved it (32218)

On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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