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Today, my girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She succeeded and slipped the used pad into her purse. I can't get rid of the memory, and I don't think I can ever eat popcorn again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50110) - you deserved it (3490)
On 10/31/2011 at 11:38am - intimacy - by ohdear (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18828) - you deserved it (11151)
On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I excitedly checked the mail to see if my Halloween costume finally arrived. It didn't. I live in an isolated city, so finding a costume by any other means than the Internet was impossible. I spent over $100 for a costume that I won't even get to wear this year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18447) - you deserved it (4719)
On 10/29/2011 at 12:01pm - money - by nocostumeforme (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33299) - you deserved it (3927)
On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34232) - you deserved it (2917)
On 10/26/2011 at 2:58am - intimacy - by Darcy (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9887) - you deserved it (35488)
On 10/22/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, it turns out that my hairy feet are the most memorable part about me. My family's named me "the hobbit". FML
I agree, your life sucks (17247) - you deserved it (2625)
On 10/15/2011 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36677) - you deserved it (2615)
On 10/15/2011 at 3:18am - misc - by Ca13b - United States (Oregon)
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37629) - you deserved it (3807)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, I spent almost $200 on a planetarium show with my boyfriend, who loves astronomy. He said his favorite thing about it was that he could pick his nose without anyone noticing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19910) - you deserved it (2464)
On 10/04/2011 at 2:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26912) - you deserved it (4029)
On 10/03/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by Ramis182 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML
I agree, your life sucks (24792) - you deserved it (2570)
On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States
Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28254) - you deserved it (4426)
On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28254) - you deserved it (4426)
On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, after months of grueling training and countless early mornings, I finally began the race I had been preparing for over the past year, only to slip and break my leg in the first 450 meters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27847) - you deserved it (1853)
On 09/25/2011 at 3:23am - health - by jc2011 - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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