kushalkaria

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kushalkaria

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10162
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kushalkaria's page activity

Visits<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 12:43am<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 3:04am<b>roro_superloser</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 10:45pm

kushalkaria's FML badges

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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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kushalkaria's favorite FMLs

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 12:40am / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

by Rapunzel1974 / 09/01/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Mississippi) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

by SplishSplash / 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

by embarrassedmom / 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 4:52pm / Norway (Akershus) / Love

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

by criminal tit offender / 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's freshly-repainted car got keyed. He's literally more of an inconsolable wreck now than he was when his own mother passed away last year. When I tried hinting that he was overreacting, he told me to go to hell. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 12:12pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I got my period 2 days early, while being interviewed for my dream job. Let's just say that I don't have very high hopes after walking backwards to the exit door and falling down upon colliding with the wall. FML

by faulty plumbimg! / 08/31/2013 at 8:14am / India / Health

Today, tired of everyone forgetting my birthday, I traveled half way around the world to spend my 40th at a five star resort just to try and make it special. The hotel brought me a cake with someone else's name on it. FML

by nevercatchabreak / 08/31/2013 at 4:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 3:24am / United Kingdom (Redbridge) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my crew and I were berated by a client for not installing her new hardwood floor on time. We were only halfway through the day, but apparently it should have only taken "like, an hour?" because "The guys on the TV shows do it that fast." FML

by smashyonewfloors / 08/31/2013 at 12:44am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, a woman screamed at me for five minutes, demanding to know how long I'd been having an affair with her husband. I explained for the second time that she'd dialed a wrong number. FML

by Tag / 08/31/2013 at 12:30am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

by no life to fuck :/ / 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML

by >_< / 08/30/2013 at 6:56pm / United States (Texas) / Love