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krez

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krez
  • Town/Country : Intarwub, NJ, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2449
  • Number of comments : 271
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About krez :
I am an adult, although I don't always act like one.

I am a single parent and a part-time gamer.

I am a computer programmer, a scientist, and a super genius.

I am a minister and an atheist, which in retrospect is kind of funny.

I am only here for the schadenfreude, although you can message me if that is your thing.

krez's last visitors

chaoss10fenellaisacuteHeartYou101gabylikescheeseswampbaby985mirrrrrrBatgirl124eatmyshortssss1jadeluv

krez's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of krez's badges

krez's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

#20484951
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26067) - you deserved it (3147) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

#20480979
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36810) - you deserved it (8940)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML

#20472335
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35851) - you deserved it (2421)

On 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm - misc - by daddy's girl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47714) - you deserved it (4600)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14458) - you deserved it (5948)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss put me on suspension, a week after granting a subordinate time off to recover from surgery. When I signed the paperwork, I was too embarrassed to admit I didn't understand her writing, which apparently said she was getting treated for "dangerously low levels of dick". FML

#20434482
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8143) - you deserved it (18359)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:42pm - work - by offtothejobcentre (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while at work taking notes on a pad of paper, my boss witnessed me trying to scroll down on the paper, as if it was a touch-screen phone. FML

#20190845
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4802) - you deserved it (21775)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:16pm - work - by mdg (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17041) - you deserved it (1165)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15273) - you deserved it (5567)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16707) - you deserved it (1240)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18386) - you deserved it (3590)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

#20185812
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6639) - you deserved it (27918)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML

#20161095
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18135) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML

#20159880
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30093) - you deserved it (1822)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:12am - misc - by BulldogHoops - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML

#20155705
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24966) - you deserved it (1079)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by Screwed - United States (Maryland)



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