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krez

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krez

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3330
  • Number of comments : 271
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About krez :
I am an adult, although I don't always act like one.

I am a single parent and a part-time gamer.

I am a computer programmer, a scientist, and a super genius.

I am a minister and an atheist, which in retrospect is kind of funny.

I am only here for the schadenfreude, although you can message me if that is your thing.

krez's page activity

Visits<b>2potato4u</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:55pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 2:44pm<b>nonamebadger</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 1:17pm<b>rawr_nigga</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 6:50pm<b>91hayek</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:42pm<b>redwolf213</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:55pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 5:54am<b>chaoss10</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:54pm<b>fenellaisacute</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 1:16pm<b>HeartYou101</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 4:32am<b>gabylikescheese</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 11:54am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 2:30am<b>mirrrrrr</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 10:46pm<b>doctor__who</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm<b>Paradoxify</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 8:14am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 8:53pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 1:18am<b>eatmyshortssss1</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 7:44pm

krez's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of krez's badges

krez's favorite FMLs

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41078) - you deserved it (2960)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

#20742274
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58653) - you deserved it (22887)

On 06/23/2013 at 6:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at a family reunion, my visibly drunk grandparents heard about my new boyfriend, who is a cop. My gran asked if he ever made me feel like Rodney King in the bedroom. Then my grandpa, fresh off a DUI, asked if my boyfriend's dick is as bent as the police force. FML

#20727456
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40055) - you deserved it (3709)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73041) - you deserved it (7223)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#20724232
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53310) - you deserved it (6522)

On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

#20720952
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49967) - you deserved it (5001)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58201) - you deserved it (16064)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61000) - you deserved it (13821)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

#20707362
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51021) - you deserved it (4692)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:08am - misc - by Thanks Honey (woman) - United States

Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML

#20690610
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56767) - you deserved it (7301)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:05am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

#20684818
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45716) - you deserved it (8363)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:37am - kids - by Laurel (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47853) - you deserved it (3356)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML

#20657778
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47414) - you deserved it (3937)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:20am - health - by those_allergies - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML

#20651461
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60296) - you deserved it (3841)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:30am - health - by Screwed Up (man) - United States

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

#20643910
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47584) - you deserved it (6344)

On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)



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