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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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kocoman500

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kocoman500
  • Town/Country : Ottawa, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 October 1996 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 361
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kocoman500 : Hmm... Let's see.
My real name is Theo, I'm half Greek, half Italian. I'm the biggest horror movie fanatic you'll ever meet. I love music, especially technooo... And for some reason, Bollywood :P I'm a pretty crazy videogamer as well. I also snowboard, play soccer, and I'm a golfer. I'm a pretty fun guy to hang around with... And I know how to cheer people up ;)
That's about it!!

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kocoman500's FML badges

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kocoman500's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

#19039920 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (5576) - you deserved it (730)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:51am - kids - by ilana (woman) - United States

Today, my downstairs neighbor died. I knew because the smell wafted up to my apartment. FML

#19008495 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (6788) - you deserved it (622)

On 02/06/2012 at 5:38am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

#18964784 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (12147) - you deserved it (1038)

On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (10134) - you deserved it (1653)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML

#18896418 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (8335) - you deserved it (1130)

On 01/24/2012 at 1:42am - love - by nacho (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

#18844188 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (7789) - you deserved it (1139)

On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

#18829619 (318)

I agree, your life sucks (9423) - you deserved it (2205)

On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that my vagina reminds him of ham. But that's okay, because ham is his favorite food. FML

#18704788 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (7450) - you deserved it (1342)

On 01/04/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by thankzbabe (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

#18703291 (260)

I agree, your life sucks (7758) - you deserved it (5509)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488 (224)

I agree, your life sucks (5326) - you deserved it (47821)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my sister's boyfriend said the only thing he'd change about her was her last name. My boyfriend told me he'd change the shape of my nose. FML

#18458740 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (8684) - you deserved it (1077)

On 12/08/2011 at 4:14am - love - by disappoint - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

#18374141 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (8703) - you deserved it (2446)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:34am - misc - by Dani - Reserved

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656 (328)

I agree, your life sucks (11627) - you deserved it (36831)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

#18234448 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (30797) - you deserved it (4935)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:53am - kids - by weswithaute - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

#18205995 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (18097) - you deserved it (6760)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:15pm - health - by stinkypants - India