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klisterable

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klisterable

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 March 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 133
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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klisterable's page activity

Visits<b>feven</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:54am<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:16pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 10:03am<b>uvuvucv</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 8:42pm

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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klisterable's favorite FMLs

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25219) - you deserved it (4871)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, I had to end a first date with the words, "You can get out of my car and go upstairs yourself, or I can come around and drag you out, bring you up the stairs, and knock on your door," because he'd gotten completely plastered in a span of about three hours. And yes, I had to drag him. FML

Today, I spent 20 minutes arguing with the class dipshit, trying to convince her that wifi hot-spots are not in fact saunas powered by wifi. FML

#21302021
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28683) - you deserved it (3272)

On 11/19/2014 at 10:09am - misc - by Donutsarelife - United States

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

#21299049
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27179) - you deserved it (4287)

On 11/14/2014 at 4:58pm - health - by gspotter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49022) - you deserved it (3471)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32972) - you deserved it (4456)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting a taxi from his place. FML

#21273346
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38677) - you deserved it (3085)

On 10/08/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by rockytrolley - Cyprus

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39781) - you deserved it (2530)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I wrecked my car because my mom texted me, telling me not to text and drive. FML

#21249597
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22792) - you deserved it (40063)

On 09/01/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41371) - you deserved it (3216)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (8724)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24878) - you deserved it (45454)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22342) - you deserved it (36541)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to bite the bullet and finally buy maternity pants. Problem is, I'm not pregnant and I'm a 25-year-old man. FML

#21188382
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35421) - you deserved it (22220)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:19pm - health - by Roy Lawson - United States (California)



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