kjd

Search for a member

Offline (the 11/25/2016 at 7:53pm)

kjd

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 January 2002 (14 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11395
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

kjd's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 6:57pm<b>Shae22fml</b> - the 10/30/2009 at 11:40pm<b>foreverabearfan</b> - the 09/16/2009 at 11:10pm<b>maximum31337</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 1:41pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/02/2009 at 12:28pm<b>POORLiLSTELA</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 7:04pm

kjd's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of kjd's badges

kjd's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a ticket for not having my headlights on. The cop who pulled me over had a broken headlight. FML

by FML / 01/05/2012 at 10:56am / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, my parents got a new dog. It attacks me every time I laugh. FML

by Imgonnahaveabf / 01/05/2012 at 7:06am / United States / Animals

Today, my biology teacher assigned us partners for a project. I got paired up with one of the smartest kids in the class. When he found out I was his partner, he cried. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (Virginia) / Geek

Today, I came home to find that my mother had sold all my valuable collector coins for cheap at a local shady pawn shop to buy herself a TV. The coins in question were worth enough to start a business. FML

by Ilostsomuch / 01/04/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, my friend set me up with a cute guy who is very germaphobic. So, I spent 4 hours cleaning my apartment. 2 minutes into the date, I sneezed. He politely told me he wasn't feeling well and left. FML

by upsetandannoyed / 01/01/2012 at 12:41am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

by thathurt / 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my favorite fish died. To make things better my parents thought to take me out to dinner. We ate sushi. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I have to choose between getting a cellphone contract that I need, or a TV that I don't even want, but which my flatmates insist I contribute towards. The same flatmates who eat all my food. This increased grocery bill has left me unable to afford either the phone or TV. FML

by WTF / 12/30/2011 at 2:10am / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

by wellthatsawkward / 12/30/2011 at 1:35am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2011 at 10:07pm / China / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that I have to share a room with my new stepbrother. I also discovered that he takes the same number of showers over the course of two weeks as I do in a single day: one. FML

by garfield749 / 12/29/2011 at 12:53am / United States / Health

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Money

Today, my boyfriend proposed. I fainted due to the excitement. He took it as a "no" and won't pick up my calls. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2011 at 7:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

by Sedici / 12/18/2011 at 2:44am / United States / Transportation

Today, I'd had it with my mom's addiction to weed, so I told her to choose between me or the weed. I'm currently looking on Craigslist for an apartment. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2011 at 10:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous