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Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35341) - you deserved it (2759)
On 01/14/2012 at 2:47am - health - by shitttyyyday - United States
Today, I dove head-first underneath my garage door, narrowly missing both the sensor and the closing door, executing a perfect roll, and popping back up onto my feet unscathed. My smugness went through the floor as I remembered I'd left my keys back in the house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13898) - you deserved it (9113)
On 01/13/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Jonkopings Lan)
Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings, so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake of her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11843) - you deserved it (27414)
On 01/13/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by machismo - United States (Ohio)
Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21587) - you deserved it (2772)
On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I've had chairs thrown at me, kicks have hit me in the nuts and I've heard "I'm gonna fucking kill you, bitch" several times. I work at a kindergarten. And this is a good day compared to what I'm used to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32003) - you deserved it (2490)
Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22478) - you deserved it (1577)
Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10853) - you deserved it (31296)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm - misc - by ThatOneGirl646 - United States (Michigan)
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36546) - you deserved it (3700)
On 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm - health - by hannaaaahr (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19787) - you deserved it (1706)
On 01/10/2012 at 8:40pm - work - by lions214 (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8742) - you deserved it (23683)
On 01/10/2012 at 7:37pm - money - by Voltron - United States
Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35925) - you deserved it (3355)
Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19527) - you deserved it (4574)
On 01/10/2012 at 4:36am - intimacy - by eakthegeek - United States
Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55330) - you deserved it (2251)
On 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by fuckparents (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24279) - you deserved it (5179)
On 01/09/2012 at 12:01am - intimacy - by LaLa - United States (Louisiana)
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22554) - you deserved it (2176)
On 01/08/2012 at 10:43pm - love - by shades (man) - United Kingdom
Monday 20 May 2013
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