Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kipfischer

Search for a member

kipfischer
  • Town/Country : STL, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 February 1986 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 1541
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kipfischer : I'm a bit on the wild side, i'll do just about anything, msg me if you want to play.

kipfischer's last visitors

huss11jsway8DblockerRababcojettli128PauloMRedX1000FMLmegan_lolsyourmurderscenexmarulicko

kipfischer's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of kipfischer's badges

kipfischer's favorite FMLs

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

#16168666
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (102964) - you deserved it (13930)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML

#16166578
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35826) - you deserved it (4155)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States

Today, my date asked if I could drive his friend home before we went out for breakfast. His friend had blonde hair, big boobs and wore a skimpy black dress. He wasn't 100% sure of her name. I guess I drove home my date's one night stand. FML

#16076552
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29364) - you deserved it (9056)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:25am - intimacy - by lawl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my date asked if I could drive his friend home before we went out for breakfast. His friend had blonde hair, big boobs and wore a skimpy black dress. He wasn't 100% sure of her name. I guess I drove home my date's one night stand. FML

#16076552
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29364) - you deserved it (9056)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:25am - intimacy - by lawl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63706) - you deserved it (7212)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my husband and I were diagnosed with herpes. We've been together for five years and were both virgins before. Even the doctor couldn't give any other explanation. FML

#15820031
729 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44714) - you deserved it (6600)

On 04/17/2011 at 10:29am - health - by bumpyroad - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

#15627116
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43618) - you deserved it (13068)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30008) - you deserved it (41478)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was out enjoying my daily jog, when out of nowhere, a group of kids in a passing car pelted me with ketchup-filled water balloons. FML

#15589666
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36288) - you deserved it (3554)

On 04/01/2011 at 2:16pm - misc - by Natalie - United States (Texas)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26276) - you deserved it (52533) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML

#15525261
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42494) - you deserved it (4822)

On 03/28/2011 at 1:26am - love - by Username - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML

#15493619
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (15172)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42543) - you deserved it (6477)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having I shot at him with the sniper gun I bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was ok. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

#15431141
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12158) - you deserved it (45491)

On 03/22/2011 at 12:31pm - misc - by FailedSniper (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

#15328400
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31002) - you deserved it (4452)

On 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm - kids - by anonymous -



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: