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kinky44

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kinky44

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1145
  • Number of comments : 300
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About kinky44 : Hello there, wandering FML-user! Welcome to my profile. Admission is $39.95, dont worry I'll bill you later. Anyway, im probably the funniest guy on FML, probably. When im not hanging out with friends, im usually on Xbox. . . or working out. I see the humor in everything and that pisses people off some times, I have been called out on it before. However, as long as I make at least one person laugh then the joke was worth it. Proud supporter of Team Nice Dynamite, the Dallas Cowboys, and KWA.

kinky44's page activity

Visits<b>thevelociraptor</b> - 21 hours ago<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:48pm<b>Kyra1</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:05am<b>JustStella</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:01am<b>PoisonOrchid</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:17pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 3:37am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 7:30pm<b>omgpp</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:58pm<b>SMHsohard</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 7:38pm<b>Since1998</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 5:53pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:45am<b>bananaman223</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 1:01am<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 12:32am<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 9:39pm<b>abdullahcakeman</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 3:39pm<b>thesociallyinept</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 10:27pm<b>Jclan_91419</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 11:07am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:58am

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50 favourites

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kinky44's favorite FMLs

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8671) - you deserved it (537)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

#21259401
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24785) - you deserved it (2057)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML

#21259366
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24975) - you deserved it (1599)

On 09/16/2014 at 10:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while waiting for my violin student to unpack his violin, he farted loudly and rhythmically on the sofa, and then went on about how it sounded like the "Shave and a Haircut" rhythm. FML

#21259194
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20058) - you deserved it (1796)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:17am - work - by cazzb - United States (Virginia)

Today, someone in my class referred to the September 11th attacks as "Nine-Elevs". FML

#21255951
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33745) - you deserved it (2794)

On 09/10/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by no - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I chatted to a nice guy and gave him my number. I told him I was going to sleep because I had a headache, and then put my phone on silent. He rang multiple times, and when I obviously didn't pick up, he sent several texts insulting me and calling me gutless for not responding. FML

#21255032
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33084) - you deserved it (3271)

On 09/09/2014 at 12:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my younger sister ran into my room, telling me someone was trying to break in. We were home alone, so she went to hide as I took a crowbar and followed the intruder. Just as I was about to swing, he turned around: it was my dad. I had to explain to my sister that burglars don't have keys. FML

#21251987
61 comments

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41447) - you deserved it (3159)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42521) - you deserved it (4917)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36762) - you deserved it (2957)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a conversation about the lack of communication in our relationship. I told him that sometimes I feel like he doesn't really care about me at all. If he did, he would listen more. His response? "I know your name, don't I?" FML

#21246190
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36691) - you deserved it (4895)

On 08/27/2014 at 12:56am - love - by Iamthatgirl (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

#21246134
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19958) - you deserved it (42182)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42945) - you deserved it (16127)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend interrupted my proposal to take a selfie with the ice cream I had just bought her. She then said no. FML

#21227229
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53804) - you deserved it (5460)

On 08/02/2014 at 12:00am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went surfing, got a few rides, then realized I had my phone in my pocket. FML

#21216262
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36867) - you deserved it (23109)

On 07/21/2014 at 1:14pm - misc - by surfer - United States (New York)



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