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killers11189

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killers11189

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 13 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 474
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About killers11189 : I play the piano and I write music and poems :) Twitter @Killers11189

killers11189's page activity

Visits<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 10:47pm

killers11189's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of killers11189's badges

killers11189's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30131) - you deserved it (7364)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#20066250
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16984) - you deserved it (67897)

On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as my dad when I overheard my mom moan his name in bed. FML

#20062873
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39202) - you deserved it (2108)

On 09/08/2012 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend requested that I shave my lips so I spent an hour in the shower carefully removing every trace of pubic hair. Turns out he wanted me to shave my moustache, not my carpet. FML

#20062588
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13311) - you deserved it (28727)

On 09/08/2012 at 12:03am - intimacy - by sasquatch (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, an unknown number left me a lengthy voicemail of what sounds like two people having sex. This is the closest I've gotten to real-life sex in 2 years. I listened to it three times. FML

#20058325
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26580) - you deserved it (8887)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:44am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, I babysat for a woman for the first time. When I arrived, there was a large pile of dishes in the sink. I decided to wash the dishes for her while the kids napped. She came home, noticed it, and bitched me out over how I'd only done it "to try and get more money" out of her. What? FML

#20048491
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25532) - you deserved it (1716)

On 08/29/2012 at 9:03pm - misc - by never again - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

#20048187
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28228) - you deserved it (6779)

On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, instead of staying home, I took an hour-long bus ride in the middle of the night to my girlfriend's place because on the phone she said, "I desperately need your body right now". It turned out she was just cold. She is also on her period. FML

#20037577
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16615) - you deserved it (31295)

On 08/23/2012 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Rotarius (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to teach my younger brother to shave with a regular disposable razor because our dad uses an electric one and I'm the only other person in the family with enough facial hair to know how to use a razor. I probably would have been proud if I wasn't a girl. FML

#19696730
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27676) - you deserved it (2445)

On 05/29/2012 at 12:06am - kids - by The Bearded Woman (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62397) - you deserved it (4622)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

#18087484
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (7949)

On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51811) - you deserved it (16549)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

#18015213
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51062) - you deserved it (8040)

On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)



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