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killerky

Offline (the 11/09/2014 at 9:49am) | Search for a member

killerky

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 17 May 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 287
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About killerky : Boss at everything.

killerky's page activity

Visits<b>jelly_rolls</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 2:50am

killerky's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of killerky's badges

killerky's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a round of applause. Too looool bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

2DAY I ASKD MA DAD TO TAKE ME TO TE STORE SO I COULD GET SOME FEMININE YGIENE PRODUCTS. WEN WE GOT TERE, E WENT RUNNING DOWN TE AISLE YELLING, "HELP! MY DAUGTER'S BLEEDING TO DEAT! WERE'RE TE TAMPONS?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41120) - you deserved it (3972)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, mah boyfriend was entertaining himself by shoving tampons up his nose and seeing how far across the bed he could blow them . This man is the father of mah son . big fat FML

#21248639
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35355) - you deserved it (8736)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

TODAY... I WAS HAMMARAD... AN ON MY WAY HOMA I WALKAD INTO A POLICAMAN. MY LOGIC WAS: IF I'M ON THA PHONA... HA CAN'T TALK TO MA... SO I PULLAD MY PHONA OUT AN STARTAD SPAAKING. THA OFFICAR THAN ASKAD MA WHY I WAS SPAAKING TO MY WALLAT. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24921) - you deserved it (45506)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, while working my shift at the grocery store, we ran out of muffins . I'm a little overwieght, and I guess that's the reason an irate customer accused me of eating all of them . FML

#21233183
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40266) - you deserved it (3862)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:50am - work - by muffins - United States (Maryland)

Taday I lost my wedding ring at work. It wouldn't be too hard to track down , except that I work at Heinz. If u find it in yur mayonnaise , keep it. FML

Yesterday, wile eating dinner wit my boyfriend, I look up to see im staring at me, smiling. Hoping e wanted to say ow lucky of a man e was wo loved me deeply, I asked im wat e was tinking. He replied, "You can't smell tat yet? It was a noxiou one." FML

#21209203
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41488) - you deserved it (6211)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:48pm - love - by KaiyaOtaku1 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today , after a power outage at house , 14-year-old brother was genuinely confused as to why our flashlights still worked if we had no electricity. FML

#21200603
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42605) - you deserved it (3943)

On 07/06/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by idiot bro (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was at my mom's funeral . My sisters and I were sitting in te front row . Te funeral director, wom we ad met wit twice before, was going around greeting everyone . Wen se got to us, se askd were our mom was . Seriously? FML

#21189397
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56433) - you deserved it (3005)

On 06/26/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Alex - United States (Hawaii)

2day I was feeling unappreciatd and askd my boyfriend if he loves me . He falterd and replid , "Uh , my dick does." FML

#21180513
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47993) - you deserved it (7957)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:33am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my broter got pantsd by is idiot friends. It was a surprise to everyone tat e was wearing women's underwear at te time, but even more of a surprise for me tat te underwear belongd to me. FML

#21175491
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47562) - you deserved it (4353)

On 06/15/2014 at 2:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at mah job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got calld into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. real FML

#21145062
193 comments

Today, mah cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today...hile lifeguarding.. . I slippd and fell from my chair and onto the cement . Embarrassd and actually quite hurt.. . I trid to climb back up to the chair.. . but it tippd . I fell half onto the cement half into the pool.. . just before the chair landd on top of me . FML

#21143534
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56323) - you deserved it (5649)

On 05/18/2014 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

TODAY, I WALKED IN ON MY MOM SHOWING HER FRIENDS THAT SHE CAN DEEPTHROAT A BANANA. THAT'S SOMETHING I COULD'VE LIVED A LONG AN HAPPY LIFE WITHOUT SEIENG. REAL FML

#21141912
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52482) - you deserved it (5055)

On 05/16/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by fuck florida (man) - United States (California)



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