About kidwiththeface42 : I appreciate intelligence. It's a privilege, so don't abuse it. Please.
I find it hilarious how people start stupid shit on the internet. It's essentially free lulz.
I'm not a grammar nazi but it does help with coherence, especially when half of these comments are stupid. But the other half is either intelligent or comical. Keeps me coming back.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25103) - you deserved it (5454)
On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States
Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17545) - you deserved it (2161)
On 04/09/2012 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21033) - you deserved it (2039)
On 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm - intimacy - by Madeline Lee (woman) - France (Aquitaine)
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18727) - you deserved it (2508)
On 04/09/2012 at 2:18pm - love - by missclitter - United States
Today, I wanted to freshen up my room, so I bought some Febreze. Standing on my bed, I began to spray, not noticing that the air vent directly across was turned on. The spray came directly back at me. The doctor says that the irritation in my eyes may last for several days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8029) - you deserved it (13906)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:18am - health - by prettysmellingbedroom - United States
Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18018) - you deserved it (4477)
On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States
Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25891) - you deserved it (3296)
On 01/05/2012 at 3:09am - health - by dusk - United States (Colorado)
Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8992) - you deserved it (21770)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:58am - misc - by Kyle - United States
Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18803) - you deserved it (11660)
On 12/24/2011 at 8:15pm - love - by Nowajerk (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my Mom and I found out that we're allergic to the wood my Dad has been making fires with. She can't see, I can't breathe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18769) - you deserved it (1354)
On 12/24/2011 at 5:05pm - health - by AllergyRidden - United States (California)
Today, I took a poop that was three states of matter. Solid, liquid, and gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17576) - you deserved it (5511)
On 12/13/2011 at 10:45pm - health - by brownunderwear - United States (Washington)
Today, I brought my girlfriend over to her first dinner with my family. My gramps spent the entire dinner telling my girlfriend how the Illuminati are plotting to take over the world and use microchips to control everyone. So much for being taken seriously now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17632) - you deserved it (2032)
On 11/18/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Trey - United States (Texas)
Today, I kindly asked my crazy roommate to move out. She answered by stuffing raw hamburger meat down all the drains in the apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20130) - you deserved it (2341)
On 11/15/2011 at 11:15pm - misc - by ledon (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10845) - you deserved it (20958)
On 11/15/2011 at 10:17pm - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I discovered that there is nothing wrong with our snowblower. I live in Alaska and for the last 10 years I have been shoveling our long steep driveway because I thought the snowblower was broken. Reality? My mother has "never been able to get it out of the shed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21352) - you deserved it (3777)
On 11/15/2011 at 1:00pm - misc - by dazean - United States (Alaska)
Monday 20 May 2013
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