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kevint9911

Offline (the 09/24/2014 at 5:19pm) | Search for a member

kevint9911

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 March 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3655
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kevint9911's page activity

Visits<b>LivClaire96</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:56am<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:45pm<b>nathancarter</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:22am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:00pm<b>getrekt</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 8:19am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 5:44pm<b>RedTailBoa</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 4:06pm<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 1:48pm<b>sydneytaylor2516</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 1:47pm<b>ladyleo88</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 12:48pm<b>PlasticSand</b> - the 02/08/2012 at 10:38pm

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kevint9911's favorite FMLs

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11432) - you deserved it (39273)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

#19939596
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34140) - you deserved it (39556)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

#19938552
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37266) - you deserved it (4460)

On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my wife told me she'd rather bust up concrete than get it on with me. FML

#19907709
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (3374)

On 07/08/2012 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

#19905936
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25074) - you deserved it (3349)

On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29912) - you deserved it (3579)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML

#19881083
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (1656)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:44pm - health - by justhelpful (woman) - Austria (Tirol)

Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML

#19876028
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6398) - you deserved it (25050)

On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50707) - you deserved it (2329)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35802) - you deserved it (5831)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML

#19636760
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7726) - you deserved it (18319)

On 05/17/2012 at 12:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14923) - you deserved it (27598)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37990) - you deserved it (3970) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML

#19563224
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6740) - you deserved it (87689)

On 05/02/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by f*ck (man) - United States

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

#19527875
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24863) - you deserved it (7772)

On 04/25/2012 at 4:06pm - kids - by KC (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)



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