kaynorr

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Offline (the 01/22/2015 at 10:35pm)

kaynorr

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 May 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 988
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About kaynorr : I like cheese but the one in my fridge is moldy FML

kaynorr's page activity

Visits<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 11:33pm<b>UndyingKarma</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:21pm<b>nialls_princess1</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 12:13am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 5:03pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 1:15am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 2:29pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 4:53am<b>amazingly_j</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 4:02am<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 3:09am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 2:10pm<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 8:47pm<b>dt1990</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 7:43am<b>chelsss3</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 12:39am<b>PotentPooters23</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 5:51pm<b>Ranger755</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:25pm<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 8:50pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 3:45am<b>Jimboom</b> - the 04/07/2011 at 6:07am

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I agree, their lives suck

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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kaynorr's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

by missca / 12/15/2014 at 11:35pm / Australia (South Australia) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

by facepalm / 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

by Brody89 / 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

by the other guy? / 03/29/2014 at 5:57pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:20am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML

by fuck my eyeballs / 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

by Ashamed_Sister / 11/30/2013 at 2:35am / Namibia (Windhoek) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I let my sister hold my newborn daughter for the first time. I heard her mutter under her breath, "I could kill you so easily..." FML

by emirie / 11/14/2013 at 4:33pm / Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML

by WTF? / 10/03/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 6:22pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm / Thailand / Kids

Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML

by thanks gramps / 04/19/2013 at 3:27am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Miscellaneous

Today, I uploaded a cute photo of my boyfriend and me on Facebook. Ten minutes later, his friend commented: "Dude! You're supposed to capture the Snorlax, not date it!" FML

by Snorlax / 04/13/2013 at 12:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML

by xx-look-at-xx / 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids