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katdaiken

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katdaiken
  • Town/Country : Ontario, Canada
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2081
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About katdaiken : I'm Canadian I love the Simpsons & what not, tattooed & happily married I work with behavioural needs & autistic students. Graduated high school & did a year of psychology in college. I love FML & I'm constantly on it :) have a good one

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katdaiken's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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katdaiken's favorite FMLs

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24312) - you deserved it (1901)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38966) - you deserved it (3394)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was waiting for the bus, I was whistling. I saw a cute girl running and I looked at my phone so it didn't seem too awkward. I was still whistling as she passed by so it sounded like I whistled at her. She ran back to slap me. FML

#21113376
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30602) - you deserved it (5057)

On 04/15/2014 at 12:24am - misc - by heycutie - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend turned down a job that would have more than doubled his income because he didn't want to upset his current boss by quitting. FML

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

#21112742
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27784) - you deserved it (19773)

On 04/14/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by tinytiny1124 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML

#21112406
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30469) - you deserved it (4563)

On 04/13/2014 at 11:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my nephews discovered how to trick my washing machine into starting up while the door is still open. My laundry room is now flooded, and their mom refuses to accept any responsibility for it. FML

Today, my coworker tried to convince my boss that I'm not human. Her examples of how I'm influenced by demons included how I don't wear a jacket in the winter, and that I once got a nosebleed from sneezing. My boss thinks she's hilarious and is playing along. FML

#21111822
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34180) - you deserved it (3242)

On 04/13/2014 at 10:51am - work - by worker666 (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that my boyfriend is so obsessed with tickling me that my body has developed a conditioned response. Now I flinch every time he touches me, no matter what we're doing. FML

#21111720
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33779) - you deserved it (3207)

On 04/13/2014 at 5:33am - love - by Ticklish - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend. As we walked back home from the cinema, he was checking his phone, when suddenly someone grabbed it and ran off. I had to be the one to go run after the thug because my 23-year-old boyfriend froze on the spot, crying. FML

Today, my girlfriend's little brother challenged me to a water gun fight. I accepted, not knowing he was going to fill his gun with vinegar, then shoot me in the eyes with it. FML

#21111233
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36041) - you deserved it (3506)

On 04/12/2014 at 3:59pm - kids - by BeatByA9yrold (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

#21111156
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31510) - you deserved it (7384)

On 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the April Fool's Day prank my girlfriend and best friend played on me was not a joke, and that they actually did sleep together. FML

#21111038
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41104) - you deserved it (2931)

On 04/12/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by gullible (man) - United States

Today, the guy I live with demanded that I get a job or start paying rent. It'd be perfectly reasonable, if he wasn't my husband, and if I hadn't just given birth to our first child. FML

#21110568
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41260) - you deserved it (4598)

On 04/11/2014 at 7:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

#21110266
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36181) - you deserved it (2510)

On 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm - misc - by Cuntlette (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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