Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kaosps2

Offline (yesterday at 8:10pm) | Search for a member

kaosps2

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 993
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

kaosps2's page activity

Visits<b>electraheart</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 6:07pm<b>Chelsea0828</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 2:27am<b>sarah6786</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 4:11pm<b>Squirrel1256</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 3:36pm<b>jsp16</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 6:57pm<b>DHoang22</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 5:05pm<b>Tpracingkg</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 5:04pm

kaosps2's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of kaosps2's badges

kaosps2's favorite FMLs

Today, my in-laws were visiting. My mother-in-law asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He said "A pimp!" I have no idea where he even heard the word, but the death glares my in-laws gave me made me want to shrivel up and die. FML

#21342258
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26053) - you deserved it (2609)

On 01/22/2015 at 1:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39163) - you deserved it (2687)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML

#21311373
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30216) - you deserved it (12823)

On 12/04/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by Red (man) -

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, it's been almost a week since I returned from my vacation to Ireland. Before I rarely drank. Now I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic. You might think I'm joking, but I've woken up hungover every day since I landed there. I basically paid to kill my liver and become AA's next poster child. FML

#21245034
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28286) - you deserved it (16044)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found my 6 year old daughter upstairs lying on the floor with scissors. She was giving "the carpet a haircut." FML

#21221737
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35196) - you deserved it (4590)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:51am - kids - by ... (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51847) - you deserved it (6644)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

#21150544
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46862) - you deserved it (3758)

On 05/24/2014 at 7:57pm - misc - by Congrats to me - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47051) - you deserved it (4031)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39671) - you deserved it (4360)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

#21077397
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34782) - you deserved it (2834)

On 03/03/2014 at 11:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46129) - you deserved it (4763)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

#20477055
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25134) - you deserved it (48193)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by chase (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, after a very heartfelt conversation with my mother, I promised her that I'd quit smoking. I walked in on her smoking my cigarettes an hour later. Her excuse was that she didn't want my money to have gone to waste. FML

#20468389
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25490) - you deserved it (3557)

On 01/19/2013 at 7:46pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: