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You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
Today, I was tutoring a band member. Whenever I ask him to play a D or any D scale, he stops just to snicker and say, "Ha ha. D." He still sucks. I hate his guts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32921) - you deserved it (4556)
On 04/25/2013 at 3:55am - work - by justgivemethed - United States (California)
Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22905) - you deserved it (4104)
On 01/07/2013 at 10:40am - love - by gassy - United States (Texas)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (3162)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18851) - you deserved it (4575)
On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36550) - you deserved it (2906)
On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, uncertain of having a job next month or being able to pay rent, I'm filling out tens of online surveys a day for gift cards to McDonald's, to buy hamburgers that I can freeze so I will have food for the coming months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16671) - you deserved it (1568)
On 09/09/2012 at 8:45pm - money - by willtype4food (man) - Finland
Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22664) - you deserved it (4103)
On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20939) - you deserved it (1749)
On 08/24/2012 at 11:45am - animals - by alix - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, my boyfriend actually held onto my love handles while we were having sex. He said they "made it easier." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15562) - you deserved it (6517)
On 08/24/2012 at 9:53am - intimacy - by chunkymonkey (woman) - United States
Today, at my job at the mall, our music malfunctioned and now will only play the same three songs over and over again. Our manager won't let us turn it off because "the customers won't notice". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14423) - you deserved it (142)
On 08/20/2012 at 12:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore
Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15999) - you deserved it (9983)
On 08/01/2012 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5571) - you deserved it (10740)
On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I searched our neighborhood for our lost dog. After screaming at the top of our lungs, driving around in circles, and asking strangers, we realized we took him to the groomers this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4196) - you deserved it (24905)
On 07/19/2012 at 7:56pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, while at work, a lady with a mustache came in and told me she was lost. I was happy to help, but could not stop rubbing my nose due to allergies. As she left she said, "I know I have a mustache you little ass" and stormed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20616) - you deserved it (2070)
On 07/16/2012 at 12:08am - work - by crazyautio - United States
Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32661) - you deserved it (1257)
On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Friday 24 May 2013
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