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The Thumb strikes back
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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28052) - you deserved it (3450)
On 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4907) - you deserved it (33729)
On 05/18/2012 at 2:07am - misc - by Karmaisabitch - United States (Colorado)
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10314) - you deserved it (16437)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22384) - you deserved it (2010)
On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6159) - you deserved it (28802)
On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went to the store for some pads with my dad. We got them and then went to the cashier. That's when he realized that they were scented. He took one out of the box, sniffed it, made me sniff it, then insisted the cashier smell it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19823) - you deserved it (1508)
On 05/13/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by vron991 - United States (Delaware)
Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16023) - you deserved it (3062)
On 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Andy (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (1401)
On 05/12/2012 at 4:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)
Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet. A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6115) - you deserved it (6543)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10580) - you deserved it (18958) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France
Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10580) - you deserved it (18958) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France
Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13486) - you deserved it (6062)
On 05/08/2012 at 9:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13486) - you deserved it (6062)
On 05/08/2012 at 9:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24717) - you deserved it (2554)
On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24717) - you deserved it (2554)
On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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