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Judgmental
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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I thought I would make my first trip to the beach. While in the water, I was stung by a jellyfish. My friend had to pee on me. I went back into the water to wash the pee off and got stung by another jellyfish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54767) - you deserved it (7350)
On 05/31/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Heather (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48939) - you deserved it (15159)
On 05/30/2009 at 10:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. 50 min into the tattoo on my back, the artist says "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28052) - you deserved it (39662)
On 05/28/2009 at 2:15pm - misc - by thats_not_good (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43655) - you deserved it (4381)
On 05/27/2009 at 6:15am - money - by abc (woman) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (190167)
On 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Jerrrr (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (215940) - you deserved it (97216)
On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I decided to go tanning. I went outside and took my top off and laid out in the sun for about an hour. When I was about to go inside a phone rang. It belonged to one of the five men that were working on my roof and watching me the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8942) - you deserved it (52323)
On 05/20/2009 at 12:54pm - misc - by fihifgni210 - United States (Florida)
Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML
I agree, your life sucks (80899) - you deserved it (18527)
On 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm - kids - by embarrassedmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was showing my new iPhone case to my friends, saying how it was scratchproof, shockproof, and waterproof. I demonstrated it by dropping it on the sidewalk from about 5 feet. It bounced onto the road. Apparently, its not truck-proof. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10209) - you deserved it (75011)
On 05/17/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19945) - you deserved it (32927)
On 05/15/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by badboyfriends (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while working at a children's day camp, one of the kids who is allergic to peanuts went into anaphylactic shock. I ran and grabbed the boys eppe pen. I was holding it backwards so the injection went into my hand, causing me to pass out and both of us to be rushed to hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20942) - you deserved it (46324)
On 05/14/2009 at 10:11am - work - by MC (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom told me to follow her car closely to my aunt's house. I kept really close to her which caused me to get pulled over for tailgating. I explained everything to the cop so he went over to my mom to see if that was the truth. My mom said she didn't know me. I got a ticket. Thanks mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64181) - you deserved it (3436)
On 05/10/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by newdriver (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (350500) - you deserved it (41209)
On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I went to the zoo with a guy I like, when we were there we saw a swarm of bees. I told him that if I got stung he would have to watch me because my dad is deathly allergic to bees and I have never been stung. Jokingly, he nudged me into the bush and said "let's see". We did. I'm allergic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51552) - you deserved it (3961)
On 05/09/2009 at 11:38pm - health - by busybee (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10651) - you deserved it (197241)
On 05/09/2009 at 12:43am - work - by pizzagurl (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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