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jweis28

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jweis28

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  • Number of visits : 1179
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jweis28's page activity

Visits<b>korscrib</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:12pm<b>darkgodxvx</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 9:36am

jweis28's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of jweis28's badges

jweis28's favorite FMLs

Today, my immature step-father rubbed my head destroying the $300 hairdo that took two and a half hours to finish. Three minutes before my wedding ceremony. FML

#18127002
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56008) - you deserved it (5978)

On 11/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by Halle - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85308) - you deserved it (13083)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85308) - you deserved it (13083)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34894) - you deserved it (4403)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I was doing my jazz aerobics workout and accidentally kicked my 3 year old daughter in the face. Everyone we know, including my wife, thinks I beat her. FML

#17613922
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28614) - you deserved it (8787)

On 08/29/2011 at 5:19pm - health - by Stan - United States (California)

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

#17536285
471 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58095) - you deserved it (7177)

On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36882) - you deserved it (9562)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

#16861259
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36840) - you deserved it (4018)

On 06/26/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by ugly - United States

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

#16378001
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39341) - you deserved it (17270)

On 05/27/2011 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by valerie - United States (Texas)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

#16378001
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39341) - you deserved it (17270)

On 05/27/2011 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by valerie - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML

#16235054
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30221) - you deserved it (11915)

On 05/18/2011 at 6:57am - kids - by JCC (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I gave a girl answers to a test. She said she would give me something pleasurable in return. She gave me a Twinkie, saying, "I know how much fat people love twinkies." FML

#16207509
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25538) - you deserved it (35030)

On 05/16/2011 at 3:34pm - misc - by pyroman1127 - United States (Utah)

Today, I was performing a show about pirates for a youth program. A child started crying because I wasn't a real pirate. A little girl took my defense: "He's a real pirate, his teeth are all yellow!" FML

#15203420
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27292) - you deserved it (10147)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17608) - you deserved it (83105)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)



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