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jwbfml

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 December 1977 (36 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1309
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jwbfml : I am here for laughs. I live in Mississippi. If you ever want to feel better about yourself, come visit us down here.

jwbfml's page activity

Visits<b>cluch3</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:05pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:47am<b>_Willa_</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 11:23pm<b>mantilla</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 5:04pm<b>Sootie247</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 6:04am<b>odod777</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 1:43pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/29/2012 at 11:27am<b>perdix</b> - the 08/23/2012 at 1:27am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 08/02/2012 at 5:29am<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/24/2012 at 2:59pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 8:48pm<b>kiwi2006</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 11:41am<b>GothicAngel17</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 10:57am<b>Duuvve</b> - the 06/11/2012 at 5:28pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/11/2012 at 1:05pm<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 7:20pm

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jwbfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48157) - you deserved it (3428)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML

#20026176
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28392) - you deserved it (6156)

On 08/17/2012 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

#20025968
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24513) - you deserved it (2677)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML

#20024660
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11461) - you deserved it (152513)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my neighbors can not only hear me singing in the shower through my apartment's paper-thin walls, they also take great delight in recording it so that they can play it at high volume for their friends when they next throw a party. I want to disappear. FML

#20022923
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (3691)

On 08/15/2012 at 5:14pm - misc - by ShowerStar (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

#20018901
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28569) - you deserved it (1758)

On 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm - misc - by jannister (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14808) - you deserved it (38488)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14808) - you deserved it (38488)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29780) - you deserved it (16406)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

#19986553
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5882) - you deserved it (37213)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by ryanharp2 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27550) - you deserved it (2363)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

#19967913
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8063) - you deserved it (18054)

On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my sister, but they already knew each other from my sister's work. She's an exotic dancer. FML

#19966736
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23310) - you deserved it (2228)

On 07/21/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Closingwild - Mexico (Jalisco)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10737) - you deserved it (36870)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11427) - you deserved it (39271)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States



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