jwbfml

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jwbfml

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 December 1977 (38 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2152
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jwbfml : I am here for laughs. I live in Mississippi. If you ever want to feel better about yourself, come visit us down here.

jwbfml's page activity

Visits<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 12:14am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:26pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 9:35am<b>foundandlost</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 6:06pm<b>cluch3</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:05pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:47am<b>_Willa_</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 11:23pm<b>mantilla</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 5:04pm<b>Sootie247</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 6:04am<b>odod777</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 1:43pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/29/2012 at 11:27am<b>perdix</b> - the 08/23/2012 at 1:27am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 08/02/2012 at 5:29am<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/24/2012 at 2:59pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 8:48pm<b>kiwi2006</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 11:41am<b>GothicAngel17</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 10:57am<b>Duuvve</b> - the 06/11/2012 at 5:28pm

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YDI master

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50 favourites

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jwbfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

by Fingkids / 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to give blood for the first time in my life. As an 18-year-old, 5'1", 110lb woman, I guess I shouldn't have been allowed there, much less permitted to leave the room to get some food. I ended up passing out in the middle of the dining hall. FML

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

by annonymous / 09/19/2012 at 2:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

by Mrs. Teacher / 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2012 at 9:46am / United States / Money

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

by Leashaness / 09/15/2012 at 7:07am / United States / Health

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited my boyfriend to his first dinner out with my family. As my older brother was discussing the injuries he'd received while working as a tow truck driver, my innocent 10 year old brother piped up saying he should see what I did to my boyfriend's back with my nails. FML

by SerendipityRose / 09/13/2012 at 1:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 1:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

by liquidknight / 09/10/2012 at 8:48am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

by liquidknight / 09/10/2012 at 8:48am / United States / Miscellaneous