julian24245

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julian24245

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3143
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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julian24245's page activity

Visits<b>predator0309</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:41pm<b>noahsmummy</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 4:58am<b>cakeisfun</b> - the 06/06/2011 at 7:23am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:11am<b>zolziski</b> - the 01/03/2011 at 4:44am<b>Jadian</b> - the 09/11/2010 at 12:02am

julian24245's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

julian24245's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML

by randomgirl / 01/07/2012 at 9:12am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

by dusk / 01/05/2012 at 3:09am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

by Kyle / 01/05/2012 at 1:58am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my biology teacher assigned us partners for a project. I got paired up with one of the smartest kids in the class. When he found out I was his partner, he cried. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (Virginia) / Geek

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML

by Kevin / 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous

Today, my Mom and I found out that we're allergic to the wood my Dad has been making fires with. She can't see, I can't breathe. FML

by AllergyRidden / 12/24/2011 at 5:05pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML

by Cookie / 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm / South Africa / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

by bathtime / 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, my business is doing so badly that people are teaching their kids to drive in the empty parking lot. FML

by Thomas / 12/20/2011 at 10:18pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

by Sedici / 12/18/2011 at 2:44am / United States / Transportation

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

by anne / 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I'd had it with my mom's addiction to weed, so I told her to choose between me or the weed. I'm currently looking on Craigslist for an apartment. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2011 at 10:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous