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julian24245

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julian24245

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  • Number of visits : 2228
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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julian24245's page activity

Visits<b>noahsmummy</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 4:58am<b>cakeisfun</b> - the 06/06/2011 at 7:23am<b>zolziski</b> - the 01/03/2011 at 4:44am<b>Jadian</b> - the 09/11/2010 at 12:02am

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julian24245's favorite FMLs

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (3955)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32159) - you deserved it (6176)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

#19059244
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9722) - you deserved it (74004)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States

Today, my friend and I were playing Oregon Trail online. I googled "dysentery", and sent her an IM about the mind-blowing number of cartoons of people violently shitting everywhere. I accidentally sent it to my aunt. FML

#19048896
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6581) - you deserved it (19219)

On 02/11/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by Gabby (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my mother used global warming as an excuse for not remembering my birthday. FML

#19042129
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29760) - you deserved it (2348)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - Belgium (Brabant Wallon)

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27399) - you deserved it (8694) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, while sitting on the toilet, I noticed there was no toilet paper left, so I dug through my purse to use my one and only pad as a substitute. It clogged the toilet, and I started my period ten minutes later. FML

#19035174
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30973) - you deserved it (17278)

On 02/09/2012 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

#19033928
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36703) - you deserved it (1900)

On 02/09/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Ouchies - United States (Colorado)

Today, I made a Sim of myself and had her work out until she was completely fit, then got her a job and a husband. Meanwhile, I sat at my desk, fat, single and jobless. FML

#19013496
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14282) - you deserved it (37122)

On 02/06/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after a twelve week dry spell followed by an eight week one, I decided to take a bit more initiative at seducing my girlfriend. Not only was she "not in the mood" again, but she offered me Trident Layers gum instead. She apparently thought that it was a fair trade. FML

#18996569
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24376) - you deserved it (4666)

On 02/04/2012 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by dasnich (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

#18984075
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36558) - you deserved it (4479)

On 02/03/2012 at 1:29pm - animals - by deadhamster - United States

Today, I was making breakfast. My microwave door was already open, but I couldn't figure that out so I kept pressing the button. According to Einstein, I'm now insane. FML

#18906599
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7271) - you deserved it (25899)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:54am - health - by lol - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML

#18905780
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20547) - you deserved it (16379)

On 01/25/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Paicked (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML

#18898578
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34782) - you deserved it (2772)

On 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm - work - by emma209 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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