julian24245

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julian24245

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3377
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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julian24245's page activity

Visits<b>predator0309</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:41pm<b>noahsmummy</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 4:58am<b>cakeisfun</b> - the 06/06/2011 at 7:23am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:11am<b>zolziski</b> - the 01/03/2011 at 4:44am<b>Jadian</b> - the 09/11/2010 at 12:02am

julian24245's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

julian24245's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

by poro123 / 11/05/2012 at 12:39am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

by Andrew / 10/30/2012 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I bought professional hair clippers to shave down below, thinking it would be safer than using a razor. Let's just say the bathroom now looks like a murder scene, and it's going to be a while before I have sex again. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2012 at 12:03am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2012 at 12:17am / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML

by NaKreen / 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise. I stood up, took a moment to soak up some sunlight, and then spent the next hour too scared to go make my morning coffee, after my mother loudly moaned, "Ah yeah, give it to me, Woody!" from down the hall. FML

by huh / 06/02/2012 at 4:31pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2012 at 11:16am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

by lol112 / 06/02/2012 at 8:47am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML

by Silent / 06/01/2012 at 10:24am / Singapore / Love

Today, my little brother got his crush to go out with him by impressing her with his level 500 FarmVille. This is the next generation. FML

by Discouraged / 05/31/2012 at 8:43am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

by gonavybeatarmy / 05/31/2012 at 1:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I am on vacation in the Smoky Mountains with my parents. They just decided to take me to the place I was conceived seventeen years ago: a bench at a public park. FML

by anon / 05/24/2012 at 2:59pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

by maggierose171 / 05/19/2012 at 11:08am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

by ...... / 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm / United States / Health