Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

juliahockey

Search for a member

juliahockey

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6067
  • Number of comments : 145
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About juliahockey : Hi. I'm Julia.
I'm not very interesting. So why are you here? That's the question

juliahockey's page activity

Visits<b>zak111</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 5:52am<b>melons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:29pm<b>danimal_crackerz</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 4:01pm<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:50am<b>Nsmith11789</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 4:15am<b>gillyman</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 6:50pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:50pm<b>TrashSnail</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:34pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:49am<b>polobeast</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 12:41am<b>theaaxis</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:39am<b>Olliebob1619</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:07pm<b>Gingerbreadman1</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:14pm<b>jabbinmonkey27</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 12:12am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 9:19pm<b>gators1995</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 1:46pm<b>Sael</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 1:26pm<b>burmillababe</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 2:45pm

Fucked!<b>gillyman</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 12:50am

juliahockey's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

juliahockey's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the mall and I saw a kid crying. I asked her "What's wrong sweetie, are you lost?" She ran away screaming "Help me!" I ended up having to explain to a dumb mall cop that I'm not a perv. FML

#15281429
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31575) - you deserved it (3694)

On 03/12/2011 at 2:18am - misc - by soul0eater (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, it was the début of the high school musical I was in. When two others and I sang the word "Hell", my mother yelled at us for using that language, while the musical was still going, and dragged me off stage. FML

#15281209
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45947) - you deserved it (3671)

On 03/12/2011 at 12:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went on a dinner date with the guy I like. He ate all his food then started eating off my plate, going on to eat over half of my food. When the bill came, he made me pay for it. FML

#15250460
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (7263)

On 03/09/2011 at 11:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, a little boy called me on the phone, crying "grandma died" in a broken voice. I just didn't have the heart to say "wrong number." FML

#15250352
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50340) - you deserved it (4559)

On 03/09/2011 at 10:47am - kids - by Waffle -

Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML

#15239631
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9104) - you deserved it (96470)

On 03/08/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by ouch (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I withdrew €40 at the ATM to pay for dinner later tonight. It wasn't until I went to pay for it that I realized I'd taken the receipt, but left the cash in the ATM. FML

#15230586
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19480) - you deserved it (40379)

On 03/07/2011 at 4:38pm - money - by booooo (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I went to a rave where apparently one of my favorite rappers was supposed to perform. I stood in line for 2 hours in the rain, got pushed and shoved, and had to witness a bunch of drunken idiots puke all over the place. Once I finally got to the front of the line, they closed the doors. FML

#15214634
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33664) - you deserved it (6370)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:25am - misc - by bullllllshittttt (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML

#15209199
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61838) - you deserved it (3998)

On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

#15203950
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40197) - you deserved it (13395)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by insomnitude (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out that if you see a picture in your boss's office of a extremely good looking, big breasted woman kissing him on the cheek, not to comment. Because that extremely good looking, big breasted woman, just might be his daughter. FML

#15193214
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11835) - you deserved it (43032)

On 03/04/2011 at 1:07am - work - by st00pid (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41535) - you deserved it (25371)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML

#15170920
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40175) - you deserved it (3294)

On 03/02/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by Acesup111 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML

#15170872
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23698) - you deserved it (2877)

On 03/02/2011 at 12:22am - work - by AntiBobTheBuilder (woman) - United States (California)

Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML

#15166184
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37383) - you deserved it (3070)

On 03/01/2011 at 7:11pm - health - by stillsick (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19701) - you deserved it (88377)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: