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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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jules_gd

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jules_gd
  • Town/Country : Germany
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 395
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jules_gd's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML

#12301472 (216)

I agree, your life sucks (31490) - you deserved it (2452)

On 08/04/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

#5762381 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (5638) - you deserved it (29155)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was fired from a job I didn't have. The manager in charge of calling me to tell me if I got the job never called, and never called me back when I left messages. The only time he called me was to fire me for not coming to orientation, which, by the way, he never called to tell me about. FML

#5753501 (55)

I agree, your life sucks (29130) - you deserved it (1337)

On 10/10/2009 at 3:23am - work - by superjesse006 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML

#5744941 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (1528)

On 10/09/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, three months after finally ending a long relationship with the love of my life because he was cheating on me, we are now seeing each other again. And cheating on our new significant others with each other. FML

#5735041 (237)

I agree, your life sucks (3907) - you deserved it (52981)

On 10/09/2009 at 2:41am - love - by oliviakelly25 (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my Cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (38502) - you deserved it (2780)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend who had just been awakened by her own fart. FML

#5550225 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (51897) - you deserved it (3372)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I got flowers at work. I was excited until I saw they were from my good friend saying, "Sorry for sleeping with your boyfriend!" FML

#5446240 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (35913) - you deserved it (1644)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:16pm - love - by Tally (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (49746) - you deserved it (1568)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

#5441571 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (28389) - you deserved it (8865)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my navy boyfriend, who's stationed in Italy, calls me to say he is in San Francisco and is coming to see me. After scrambling to get ready, he calls me back to say he doesn't recognize the train station. After searching on Google Maps, it becomes clear he's drunk at Oktoberfest. In Germany. FML

#5438718 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (30439) - you deserved it (1911)

On 09/23/2009 at 10:47pm - love - by Spatch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, for the first time, I hugged the man I have been in love with for four years. It was a congratulatory hug at his wedding to my best friend. FML

#4874112 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (45620) - you deserved it (9512)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:23am - love - by itrustedsnapeallalong (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I spotted my neighbour's cat sitting on their front garden. I bent over and began walking towards it with my hand out saying, "Hello pussycat". I was only a few feet away when I realised I was talking to a white bag of sand. I turned to see my family in hysterics. FML

#4806587 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (8646) - you deserved it (25491)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:40am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I woke up to the sounds of birds singing, the smell of butter pancakes in the air and thought to myself "Wow, today is going to be great day. I can feel it!" Excited, I jumped out of my bed and threw open the door to see my 58 year old mother doing her morning stretches in the nude. FML

#4803979 (137)

I agree, your life sucks (33349) - you deserved it (2723)

On 08/25/2009 at 2:47am - animals - by MrMagicMan000 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my first period. My dad bought me a card and had everyone in my family sign it. FML

#4787214 (308)

I agree, your life sucks (42061) - you deserved it (2979)

On 08/24/2009 at 3:59pm - misc - by embarassed_chick (woman) - United States (Illinois)