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jrp

Offline (the 09/07/2014 at 6:28pm) | Search for a member

jrp

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 461
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jrp's page activity

Visits<b>McNikk</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 9:44pm<b>sonnyrosa</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 10:43am

jrp's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

jrp's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10717) - you deserved it (36827)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

#19945004
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15858) - you deserved it (25241)

On 07/16/2012 at 10:38am - kids - by oops123 (woman) - United States

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13335) - you deserved it (54574) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML

#18958302
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22346) - you deserved it (4279)

On 01/31/2012 at 1:22am - kids - by beautifulme (woman) - United States

Today, I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I went and took a shower, and as I tried to get out, the door jammed. I called my friend for help, and after much tugging, the glass shattered all over me. She panicked and sent her dad to rescue me. It was the first time he and I had met. FML

#18666751
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24583) - you deserved it (2161)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by Lotje13 - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19944) - you deserved it (43737)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

#16596385
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20771) - you deserved it (47629)

On 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm - love - by gabxoxo03 - United States (New York)

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

#16591385
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38879) - you deserved it (4298)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:09am - work - by lilben (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80642) - you deserved it (6032)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19273) - you deserved it (65860)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while sitting at my desk at work, a co-worker asked for my help. It was only after I had walked over to his desk, bent over, answered his question, and walked back to my stall, that I felt a breeze. My tube top had slid down across my breasts, revealing my bra to the entire office. FML

#12000317
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10148) - you deserved it (38669)

On 07/20/2010 at 8:43am - work - by Lana (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14604) - you deserved it (54648)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up late for a very important presentation. I got dressed but forgot to wear a bra. During the presentation, I bent down to adjust a shoe strap. I rose to find that the thin straps of my blouse snapped and exposed my breasts. I gave a great presentation and a titty show. FML

#9095970
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13467) - you deserved it (30801)

On 03/15/2010 at 2:35am - work - by exposed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met my boyfriends parents. I hope my charm and smile was enough for them to forgive me for not wearing pants. FML

#9023853
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8001) - you deserved it (26899)

On 03/12/2010 at 11:55am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my mom walked in on me and my boyfriend having sex. She was completely embarrassed (as was I) and she flew out of the room. My boyfriend, on the other hand, still wanted to finish. FML

#8818835
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9385) - you deserved it (16873)

On 03/04/2010 at 5:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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