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jossii

Offline (the 01/17/2014 at 11:59pm) | Search for a member

jossii

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 375
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jossii's page activity

Visits<b>angelicdevil</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 4:48am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 2:47pm<b>TunaFireStarter</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 2:03pm<b>Morreb</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 10:12am<b>Daonna</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 10:11pm<b>iMeowchu</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 3:52pm<b>XOXONic</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 10:31am<b>Garagedwella</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 2:46am<b>Nooblah</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 10:03pm<b>TheBossOne</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 4:46pm<b>xAttackAttackx</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 1:37pm<b>JohnTheLad</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 2:03pm<b>lilhellian</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 3:07am<b>tigerfish</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 9:40pm<b>dman255</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 12:25am<b>bettyboop428</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 11:43pm<b>Valdrek</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 9:52am<b>stj5249</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 4:29pm

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jossii's favorite FMLs

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41689) - you deserved it (15668)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

#20535134
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36759) - you deserved it (2155)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm - kids - by Maxie - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54630) - you deserved it (14373)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36945) - you deserved it (12394)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

#20518830
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25182) - you deserved it (43033)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by think i'm dating perdix (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I found a cup full of urine in the bathtub. No one in my family knows where it came from. This is the second time it's happened. FML

#20498051
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29062) - you deserved it (2284)

On 02/08/2013 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the guy that I've liked for a while but never had the courage to talk to was wearing a TARDIS shirt. I jokingly asked, "Are you the Doctor?" His response was for me to "Go away, f***ing nerd." FML

#20492128
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32779) - you deserved it (4004)

On 02/03/2013 at 9:16pm - love - by guessnot (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47579) - you deserved it (3561) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

#20484951
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32011) - you deserved it (4540) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML

#20458013
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32916) - you deserved it (2698)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I watched Gigli. FML

#19259305
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7660) - you deserved it (24763)

On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)



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