jonny2x4

Search for a member

jonny2x4

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18732
  • Number of comments : 900
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jonny2x4 : Hi my name is Jonny. I live in a cul de sac in the suburbs of California. I may have an inanimate piece of wood for a friend, but I always keep it real. My brand of honesty you wouldn't get from anyone else.

BTW, was she hot?

jonny2x4's page activity

Visits<b>paigexox0</b> - the 11/10/2016 at 3:30am<b>BoneCollector</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 8:51pm<b>steam_engenius</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 2:54am<b>Kalilahshmeow</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 4:23pm<b>OmniSomni</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 5:12pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 8:51pm<b>flyingflies</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:02am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:10am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:02pm<b>takenusername628</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:27pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 1:35am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:50am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 6:09pm<b>ppeanutheadd</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 9:07pm<b>wintersoldier</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:47pm<b>LingRay</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:01am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:59pm<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 12:22am

Fucked!<b>yellow33</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:02am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:50pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:45pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:47am

jonny2x4's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jonny2x4's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking home down a small street while listening to my iPod. I really got into the music, and started to dance really badly, only to realise there was a car following me, trying to get past. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2010 at 5:04am / Australia / Transportation

Today, I was casually looking through my girlfriend's phone while she got ready, though she made me promise not to. To my confusion, I discovered that she had me listed as 'Saturday' in her contacts. There was also a Thursday, Friday and Sunday listed. I only ever see her on Saturdays. FML

by iprobablyhaveherpes / 10/20/2010 at 12:47am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, I realized the benefits at Burger King are better than at my company. I'm an engineer, have three degrees, speak three languages fluently, and work at a multi-billion dollar company. The guy flipping burgers has better health care and more corporate 401k contributions than I do. FML

by engineerdude91 / 10/19/2010 at 11:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML

by S3R1AL K1LL3R X / 10/19/2010 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked into my home office and said F*** you! Then she ran to my husband and said "Did I say it right?" FML

by Ashley Marshburn / 10/17/2010 at 9:55am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I learned that making an illegal U-turn right after you see a cop doing one will not stop said cop from ticketing you. FML

by Triumvirate / 10/16/2010 at 1:26am / United States (California) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized I was happy because we finally started having friends come visit us after months of not having company. I also realized that our secret stash of money was stolen last night while we had company. FML

by robbed / 10/13/2010 at 10:25pm / United States (Mississippi) / Money

Today, I realized I was happy because we finally started having friends come visit us after months of not having company. I also realized that our secret stash of money was stolen last night while we had company. FML

by robbed / 10/13/2010 at 10:25pm / United States (Mississippi) / Money

Today, I started making love to my wife as soon as the kids were occupied. She just laid there the whole time and never responded, except for a few times to say "Ouch." FML

by ahddib / 10/13/2010 at 10:13pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML

by failure / 10/13/2010 at 2:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a combo bidet-and-dryer, and how she would like to get one so she can feel "fresh down there" without worrying about getting bits of toilet paper on her nether regions. I can't un-hear this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 1:46am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned the hard way that leaving eye drops in your car all day makes them scorching hot. FML

by Username / 10/08/2010 at 5:30pm / Health

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No, now get out of my house." FML

by Vinny1017 / 10/07/2010 at 10:26am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, after bringing my dog back inside, he started whining. I thought it was because he wanted his toys, but he was really trying to say, "Help me," as a torpedo of diarrhea exploded out of him, leaving a trail down the hallway. FML

by ukfan / 10/06/2010 at 12:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML

by crucets / 10/06/2010 at 12:37am / United States (Texas) / Love