jonny2x4

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jonny2x4

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17627
  • Number of comments : 900
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jonny2x4 : Hi my name is Jonny. I live in a cul de sac in the suburbs of California. I may have an inanimate piece of wood for a friend, but I always keep it real. My brand of honesty you wouldn't get from anyone else.

BTW, was she hot?

jonny2x4's page activity

Visits<b>OmniSomni</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 5:12pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 8:51pm<b>flyingflies</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:02am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:10am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:02pm<b>takenusername628</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:27pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 1:35am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:50am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 6:09pm<b>ppeanutheadd</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 9:07pm<b>wintersoldier</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:47pm<b>LingRay</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:01am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:59pm<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 12:22am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 10:13pm<b>Dangerousreaper</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:58pm<b>ShutUp007</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:25pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:02am

Fucked!<b>yellow33</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:02am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:50pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:45pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:47am

jonny2x4's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jonny2x4's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my birthday. My parents got me a box of cupcakes. My brother got me a deck of cards. My aunt got me a brochure on how to quit smoking. I have diabetes, I don't play cards, and I don't smoke. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 6:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I felt like adding my real middle name to my facebook name to make it look more professional. It was denied because they didn't feel it was a legitimate request. Minutes later, someone with the name of "Galactic Toast" friend requested me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 2:35pm / United States / Geek

Today, I had to pull guard duty. I had to guard the latrine because somebody likes to stuff whole toilet paper rolls in the toilet to clog it. Only six more months in Iraq. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 1:38am / Iraq / Work

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 12:11am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, I won employee of the month. I was then fired for being late. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2010 at 10:08pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2010 at 2:09pm / Love

Today, I was forced to go to the mall with my dad. He wore a bear suit the entire time. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2010 at 9:37pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend of a year because I discovered she had been cheating on me. Her defense was, "It wouldn't be a problem if you were just OK with this." FML

by anonymous / 11/23/2010 at 4:32am / Intimacy

Today, I realized that 95% of my facebook friends added me only because they think my sisters are hot. FML

by smallfrie32 / 11/23/2010 at 12:22am / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML

by reesemaster / 11/22/2010 at 7:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

by painfulintercourse / 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML

by pst / 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Intimacy

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2010 at 2:47am / Kids

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm / United States / Work

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2010 at 8:54pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love