jonny2x4

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jonny2x4

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17605
  • Number of comments : 900
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jonny2x4 : Hi my name is Jonny. I live in a cul de sac in the suburbs of California. I may have an inanimate piece of wood for a friend, but I always keep it real. My brand of honesty you wouldn't get from anyone else.

BTW, was she hot?

jonny2x4's page activity

Visits<b>OmniSomni</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 5:12pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 8:51pm<b>flyingflies</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:02am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:10am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:02pm<b>takenusername628</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:27pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 1:35am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:50am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 6:09pm<b>ppeanutheadd</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 9:07pm<b>wintersoldier</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:47pm<b>LingRay</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:01am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:59pm<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 12:22am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 10:13pm<b>Dangerousreaper</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:58pm<b>ShutUp007</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:25pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:02am

Fucked!<b>yellow33</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:02am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:50pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:45pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:47am

jonny2x4's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jonny2x4's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to choose between living with my over protective dad who only uses me for free childcare, or my pot smoking mom who always needs to borrow money. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2010 at 10:25pm / United States (North Carolina) / Money

Today, I was told by my mom that I'm a terrible person because I won't help my brother get a girlfriend. He's gay, but won't tell her because he thinks it's hilarious when she yells at me. FML

by Username / 12/27/2010 at 3:39am / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife thinks I will agree to anything she says if she just pleasures me orally. I now found out, she is correct. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2010 at 1:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a group of carolers was coming up my street, so I went out in the cold to wait for them. When they finally arrived, I waved and greeted them. They huddled up discussing something while pointing at me, then skipped my house. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2010 at 2:42am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

by shit / 12/14/2010 at 4:26am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I spent ages looking for a parking space at the mall. I saw a couple walking out of the mall and decided to follow them and take their space when they left. After following them for a good ten minutes, I realised they were heading to the bus stop. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2010 at 4:55pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my mom that I'm gay. She sympathetically patted my back and told me I don't need to make up excuses for me being so unattractive to women. FML

by augh / 12/10/2010 at 3:24am / Miscellaneous

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 11:53pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

by bribreeeeeezyfreshhh / 12/06/2010 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 6:23am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I got fired from the job I'd had for eleven years for going onto Facebook while on the clock. When I got home, I saw that my boss had updated his status, from work, to "Finally fired that bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2010 at 9:41am / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, I got fired from the job I'd had for eleven years for going onto Facebook while on the clock. When I got home, I saw that my boss had updated his status, from work, to "Finally fired that bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2010 at 9:41am / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted get to know my mom, so they went off and had a chat. After an hour, I noticed my girlfriend was gone and my mom was waiting for me. Apparently I've been dumped through my mother. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2010 at 4:50pm / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

by nickyboy / 12/02/2010 at 12:02pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy